Evergreen
Gardens

HOME

Garden
Tour

Totems

Fairy
Garden

Archways

Birds

Bird
Stations

Backyard
Bird List

Flowers

Main Pond

Corner
Pond

Waterfall

Bathtub
Pond

Angel
Statues

St. Francis

Variety of Statues

Odds &
Ends

Wildlife

 Words
of
Wisdom

Jokes....
Some Contain Mature Content!!

New York
City Trip

  
Disorder  in  the  American  Courts....

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place!

 Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

Q: So the date of conception of the baby was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

Q: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.

Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the
> autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A. Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere in Massachusetts.                                                           
 
Gynecologist  or  Mechanic...

A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and was on the verge of being burnt out. Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to change careers and become a mechanic.

He found out from the local technical college what was involved, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could. When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks, and completed the exam with tremendous skill. When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%.

Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wondered if there had been an error which needed adjusting." The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark." The instructor went on to say, " I gave you an extra 50% because you did all of it through the muffler.
                                                                           
 

Jokes Main Index

Chuckles
Page 3
 


Fairies

 


Copyright © 2004 All Rights Reserved
Infocom Canada Business Consultants Inc.
4456 Noel Crescent, Val Therese, Ontario, P3P 1S8
Phone: (705) 969-7215    Fax: (705) 969-8427    Email

 

     

     

     

     

     

 
 
 
 
 
 

 
  
  

   

Fairies