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FAMILY   CIRCUS!

Page  1

Page  2  

Friskey To The Rescue

Uncle Jimmy

Grandma Hitting The Sauce

Cindy versus Mom  

Foggy Mountain Highs

Friskey  To  The  Rescue!


When I was about 10 years old, my father comes home from work with this Boxer/Dalmation/Ridge Back mix puppy.  We named him Friskey and he lived up to his name.

Anyway, this dog was a chewer.  My father lost half his socks off the clothes line every month and he pranced around with my mother's "Granny Panties"  in the back yard as if he'd captured some sort of trophy.

The one thing he loved was being in the house.  The one thing my mother wouldn't allow after he was 6 months old because he used the  furniture as his "teething ring".  Not to be deterred.  Little by little, he tore this gaping hole in the sliding door screen and used to try to inch his way (it took all day) into the living room until half his body was in the back yard and half was in the living room.  It was an ongoing battle for control and nobody was winning. 

He was and excellent watch dog, though and hated, just hated anyone in a uniform.  This did not bode well for the mailman, who refused to come to the door and my mom had to go out and take the mail from him from the curb.

One day, while Friskey was in the process of sliding into the living room, my mother crossed his path and he started snarling and growling.  Anyone who knows my mother understands the concept of "Alpha Female".  She stood about 3 feet away from him and in a threatening voice said, "Are you growling at me!?"

Just then the front screen door opened enough to let out a few squeaks and my mother turned to see this strange man opening the door to get into the house. The dog was growling at the guy who had been standing on the front porch before my mom even knew he was there.

Well, the dog lit out after him and if you can imagine some oversized dog chasing this guy down a neighborhood street at 10 in the morning, barking and snarling.  All the neighbors came out watch the show.

Friskey chased the guy around the corner and 5 minutes later, he came back, prancing proudly up the street . . .  with the back of the man's pants in his mouth.  The neighbors started cheering and of course that encouraged him to start shredding his "kill".

My mom was laughing the whole time and when he came home, she cooked him up a
steak  and let him stay in the house the whole day.  He never touched any of the furniture after that and my mom never questioned his instincts again.

                                                                      Submitted by Rain

Grandma  Hitting  The  Sauce!


I don't know if this qualifies for "worst," but my family get-togethers when my grandmother was still alive could be very interesting. I don't know if Rain's ever been there, but there's a restaurant in Pasadena called Cameron's, where they serve mostly seafood, but have really good steaks (being allergic to anything that lives in water, I don't have much choice anyway). Anyway, Grandma ordered Lobster Thermidor, which grosses me out, and Grandma was eating the sauce with a spoon. Oh, and Grandma was hard of hearing, and always turned her hearing aids down while she was eating, which meant we could say just about anything we wanted. ;-) Can you see where I'm going here? 

Aunt Geri was looking at Grandma eating the sauce in horror, and saying "I don't know HOW she can eat that!" My response was, "But Aunt Geri, it just goes straight through!!!!!!" Which is true- she always had horrid problems like that. Aunt Geri was horrified, but still laughing her head off, my brother Tim wanted to know what I'd said, but Aunt Geri told me not to repeat it, and Mom said "Whatever you said, don't repeat it!" Knowing that I would, given the chance. I have a small problem like that- I'll come up with a quick answer to something someone says without thinking about what I'm saying. 

I did tell Tim later, but it wasn't as funny to him as it would have been if I'd told him at dinner. I still laugh at this one when I think about it. Oh, and Grandma brushed her teeth with Milk of Magnesia. (shiver in disgust) I have a lot of funny stories about my grandmother from Mom because Grandma had a very difficult personality, but didn't realize that she was so amusing after the fact.

                                                                         Submitted by Ginnilee

Foggy  Mountain  Highs!

One morning after waking up and getting the two older children their bottles, (This was like, 5 years ago) I went in to take my medicine, have a pepsi and wake up. After about 15 mins.had passed, I walked through the bath in the master bedroom, to get to the kitchen and I found these same two children standing over the toilet, with the lid and seat up. They were saying; "You do it", "No, you first Jimmy"....

At first I was puzzled, but then my own words hit me like a brick. I told the toddlers, when you are done with your bottles go put them in the toilet"!!!! I meant sink of course, but being good kids, they were trying to do just what I told them to do. Luckily I caught them in time and we put the bottles in the sink and not the toilet lol. They were confused children that morning! LOL
I call these my "foggy mountain highs"
                                                                          Submitted by Jane

 


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