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EDITORIALS FROM 2008 |
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" Hilda
Kingsley:
We
Will All Remember How She Spent Her Dash!"
December 15, 2008 |
When
I first heard that Hilda Kingsley had passed away, my first
reaction was simply, “WOW!” I have known Hilda for as long
as I have lived in
Valley
East
, which
was since 1974. Hilda was “everywhere”. She seemed to be
involved in just about everything that you could imagine and
her passion for working for children in minor sports was
legendary. All I could think of was WOW! I could sense a loss
of much more than a friend and acquaintance. I sensed the loss
of a community icon. A loss that will change the face of
Valley
East
forever.
Hilda was everywhere and now she is gone.
I thought about Hilda again, and wondered, “How can
Valley
East
ever be
the same without her?”
At the same
time, I began to realize just how much of a difference Hilda
meant to
Valley
East
and now
it is up to the rest of us to step it up a notch and carry on
in her memory. She served for so many years in minor hockey
with the N.O.H.A., was a driving force behind the Consbec
‘AAA’ Midgets, was instrumental in the development of
minor soccer, and volunteered with the Club Richelieu. She was
also ready to give of her time to help anyone who needed her
assistance, and she will be forever known as the First Lady of
The Renegades Organization, perhaps her greatest contribution
of all.
Hilda was
the first inductee in the Volunteer Category to the Valley
East Sports Hall of Fame in 1998. There was no question as to
who the first inductee would be. It had to be Hilda Kingsley.
She made such a difference in the community.
Even though Hilda was someone who always had time to
volunteer to help out with minor sports, she also had time to
be a very devoted wife to Jean-Paul and a loving mother to her
two sons, David and Mark, both of whom are still living in
Hanmer. Her greatest joys in life were her two grandchildren,
Rebecca and Kaitlin.
A lady named Linda Ellis once wrote a little poem that
I think best expresses Hilda Kingsley’s life. The poem is
entitled, “The Dash”. As you read it, if you knew Hilda
Kingsley, think of how it is a fitting description of this
very special woman. Also, think about yourself and ask if this
poem could be used to describe your own life one day or to
describe someone you once knew who is no longer with us.
HILDA
KINGSLEY
March 14, 1946
–
December 5, 2008
The
Dash, by Linda Ellis:
I read of a man who stood to speak
At the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
From the beginning to the end.
He
noted that first came the date of her birth
And spoke of the following date with tears,
But he said what mattered most of all
Was the dash between those years.
For
that dash represents all the time
That she spent alive on earth
And now only those who loved her
Know what that little line is worth.
For
it matters not, how much we own,
The cars…the house…the cash.
What matters is how we live and love
And how we spend our dash.
So
think about this long and hard;
Are there things you’d like to change?
For you never know how much time is left
That can still be rearranged.
If
we could just slow down enough
To consider what’s true and real
And always try to understand
The way other people feel.
And
be less quick to anger
And show appreciation more
And love the people in our lives
Like we’ve never loved before.
If
we treat each other with respect
And more often wear a smile…
Remembering that this special dash
Might only last a little while.
So
when your eulogy is being read
With your life’s actions to rehash,
Would you be proud of the things they say
About how you spent your dash?
Joseph Epstein once said, “We do not choose to be
born. We do not choose our parents, or the country of our
birth. We do not, most of us, choose to die; nor do we choose
the time and conditions of our death. But within this realm of
choicelessness, we do choose how we live.”
A lot will
be said about Hilda Kingsley and about how she lived her life,
but the most fitting tribute of all will be that she showed us
all how to spend our dash.
Have a good
week.
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"How
To Deal With Stress During The Christmas Season "
December 8, 2008 |
I’m
sure I don’t have to say much to convince you that Christmas
is one of the most enjoyable times of the year. There is so
much goodness in the air and it is a time when we can all take
a deep breath and see everything that is wonderful with this
world despite the economic and political problems that exist
today. It is a time when it is perfectly acceptable to see the
world through “rose coloured glasses”.
So why do
so many of us also find that this is the most stressful time
of the year as well?
Many
experts tell us study after study has found that Canadians in
general and parents in particular, declare they are under more
financial and emotional stress than ever before in the history
of our country. Canadians of all ages are suffering from
chronic emotional health problems because of the pressure on
families today. And if you happen to be one of those persons
who disagree with these comments then you are most likely in
the worse shape of all.
When asked
to identify the causes of the stress, many people indicate
that they are working too hard and too long for too little
money; there is a lack of job security; taxes are too high;
the cost of living keeps going up faster than wages; there are
relationship problems between spouses and children; school
concerns among children affect the entire household; and the
list goes on and on.
Admittedly, no family can escape the stress of everyday
life, but at no time of the year is the stress upon families
greater than it is during the Christmas holiday season. And
often this stress, mixed in with all of the wonderful things
about Christmas, goes unnoticed, even though the effects are
building up inside. Perhaps that is why so many people “go
wild” on New Year’s Eve to release the stress.
Therefore, as much as people may look forward to
Christmas, and even though it is a time for people to get
together and visit with friends and relatives, few will argue
that Christmas is also the most hectic, stress-filled time of
the year.
If you are
going to make it through another holiday rush, you must
develop strong survival techniques which will control your
stress level and allow you to enjoy the beautiful moments of
the season. In other words, you must become a calming
influence in the middle of a stressful storm of commotion.
The most important thing you must do is convince
yourself that it is absolutely useless to get upset about
things that are beyond your control. You can’t always get
your own way, no matter how much you complain or wish you
could change things. If you must go shopping between now and
Christmas, don’t complain about the crowds, the traffic, the
rudeness or the chaos in the stores. When you are the tenth
person in line at the check-out counter, accept the fact that
this is the way it is and nothing you can do will change it.
Once you surrender to this reality you will find a strange
sense of peace take over your mind and you can actually enjoy
the time spent in line, talking to fellow shoppers.
Secondly, take the little things that happen every day
in stride and accept them for what they are – simply life
happening. The next time one of your children accidentally
knocks over your favourite glass vase, causing it to break on
the floor, don’t get upset and rant and rave about their
carelessness. Accept it for what it is – a moment in life
that includes a broken glass. Use it as a teaching moment to
show you child how to carefully pick up the pieces and dispose
of them so as not to endanger anyone else. Show the child how
to safely get every last little sliver off the floor. And
while you are doing it, think about how many times in your own
life you accidentally broke items around the house. It may
actually be hard to hide your smile. When it is all over, give
your child a hug and remind him/her to be more careful next
time.
If you can change your reactions to negative events so
that your response reflects a calm and peaceful acceptance,
you will discover that the solutions to these negative moments
are readily at hand. And even in the midst of the chaos of the
Christmas holidays you will be amazed at how much easier your
life will become.
During this stressful period let’s all try to see
everything that happens in the spirit of the season. After
all, there is no better time to be alive than at Christmas.
Have a good
week! |
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"The
Day I Didn’t Get A Thing Done!
The Best Day of My Life!"
December 1, 2008 |
Friday,
October 24, 2008
was one
of those days that I will remember for the rest of my life. As
it happened, my daughter-in-law, Angele, was scheduled to be
in the hospital to deliver her third child. My son and both
grandmothers were naturally with her for the blessed event.
That meant that Grandpa (me) was chosen to accompany my
four-year old granddaughter, Hailee, on her first ever
field-trip.
Her
teacher, Mrs. Renee Brunet was taking her JK class to Neil’s
Independent Grocers for a tour of the store and to carve
pumpkins to take home. It was “Pumpkin Day!”
I recalled
that when told I had to go on the field trip my first thought
was about how I was going to have to rearrange my entire
schedule and put all of my work on hold for the trip. It
seemed like a lot of trouble just to end up watching Hailee
spend 15 minutes carving a pumpkin.
When the
day finally came to an end and I was preparing to crawl into
bed on October 24, I lay there for a few moments thinking
about what had happened to me that day.
I thought
about the excited sound of Hailee’s voice the night before
as she told everyone she saw that her Grandpa was coming with
her on the bus for “Pumpkin Day”. She had been looking
forward to it for days.
I thought
about the look on her face when I walked outside into the
school playground that morning as she ran up to me with open
arms. She had me carry her around the school yard for a few
minutes. She was almost shaking with joy as her friends and
classmates watched the two of us. Then we spent the next ten
minutes holding hands walking around among the other children
– just her and her Grandpa.
I thought
about her smile as she kept looking back at me from her chair
in the classroom while her teacher took attendance and went
through the opening exercises. She seemed so happy to have
Grandpa in her class. It didn’t seem like such a big deal to
me at the time. After all, I had spent 28 years doing the same
thing with my own classes. I never saw it through the eyes of
a four year old.
I thought
about stepping into the bus that was going to bring us to the
grocery story and how excited she was to lead me to a seat at
the back of the bus. She kept looking over at me, smiling at
the sight of Grandpa on the bus with her. And then her teacher
sat in front of us and Hailee was so proud.
I thought about the time spent walking around the store
with Hailee and her class, looking at all of the things that
she had seen hundreds of times before, and yet, I could sense
that it was different this time for her, together with her
classmates, holding her Grandpa’s hand.
Hailee
didn’t seem to mind as much as I did that the tour took so
long before we finally sat down in the community room and were
given the pumpkins to carve. Her Grandpa had never carved a
pumpkin before, so thankfully her teacher, Mrs. Renee Brunet
gave us a hand.
I thought about how proud Hailee was as we entered the
bus again to go back to Jean Paul II, with her pumpkin in a
plastic bag and how excited she was that Grandpa was going to
drive her home when we arrived at the school. She was going
home early with Grandpa because this was a special day – she
was going to get a new brother that day.
I thought
about the look on her face as she was seen by all of the other
children walking hand-in-hand with her Grandpa to his truck to
go home. She waved to them with a pride that only a four-year
old with her Grandpa could understand.
I thought about our ride home and how she sat there
quietly, holding her pumpkin and grinning from ear to ear.
What was going through her mind on this very important day in
her life?
I thought
about spending the entire afternoon at the hospital with my
wife, waiting for Angele to deliver the baby, and how I then
had to leave at around
5 p.m.
to go
back and baby-sit Hailee and her sister, Hannah. After all
that time waiting at the hospital I was not even going to be
around at the time of birth.
I thought
about how excited the girls were when Grandpa arrived to
finish giving them dinner and to stay with them.
I thought
about how their faces lit up with joy when the phone call
finally came that evening from the hospital and they spoke to
their mother who announced the arrival of their baby brother,
Cade. I know now how fortunate I was to be with them to
witness their joy at the news of the birth.
I
then, for a brief moment, thought about all of the things that
I didn’t get done that day. Things that I had to reschedule
for another day. And
then, as I drifted off in one of the most peaceful sleeps I
have had in a long time, I realized that I will always
remember
October
24, 2008
as one of
the best days of my life. Thank you, Hailee.
Have a good
week!
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"Tangled
Christmas Tree Lights "
November 24, 2008 |
Let me begin today with a
story about a man and
his son who were walking in the forest one day.
Suddenly the boy tripped, felt a sharp pain and
screamed, “Ahhhhh."
Surprised,
he heard a voice coming from the mountain screaming as well,
“Ahhhhh!"
Filled with
curiosity, he screamed: "Who are you?",
but the only answer he received was: "Who are
you?"
This made
him angry, so he screamed:
"You are a coward!” and the voice answered:
"You are a coward!"
He looked at his father and asked, "Dad, what is going on?"
"Son,"
the man replied, "Pay attention!"
Then the
father screamed, "I admire you!"
The voice
answered: "I admire you!"
The father
shouted, "You are wonderful!", and the voice
answered: "You are wonderful!"
The boy was
surprised, but still couldn’t understand what was going on.
Then the father explained, "People call this 'ECHO', but
truly it is 'LIFE!' Life always gives you back what you give
out! Life is a
mirror of your actions. If
you want more love, give more love! If you want more kindness,
give more kindness! If you want understanding and respect,
give understanding and respect! If you want people to be
patient and respectful to you, give patience and respect! This
rule of nature applies to every aspect of our lives. Life
always gives you back what you give out. Your life is not a
coincidence, but a mirror of your own doings.”
Whenever I come across that story I am reminded that no
matter how complicated or challenging life may seem at times,
true happiness and fulfillment is still just a matter of
following some pretty simple principles.
I mean, how much more basic can you get. “Life always
gives you back what you give out. Your life is not a
coincidence, but a mirror of your own doings.” It is as
simple as an echo. Whatever you put out, you get back.
I also like
reading reflective quotes about life and I would like to share
some with you right now. I’m not sure where this came from,
but it is something I enjoy reading from time to time. It is
called “Things I’ve Learned During My Life…”
1. I've
learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems
today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.
2. I've
learned that people will forget what you said, people will
forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made
them feel.
3.
I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by
the way he or she handles these three things: a rainy day,
long grocery check out lines, and tangled Christmas tree
lights.
4.
I've learned that regardless of the differences you
have with the people in your life, you'll miss them when
they're gone.
5. I've
learned that making a "living" is not the same
thing as making a "life."
6.
I've learned that life sometimes gives you a
second chance.
7. I've
learned that you shouldn't go through life with a
catcher's mitt on both hands. You need to be able to
throw something back.
8.
I've learned that if you pursue happiness, it will
elude you. But if you focus on your family, your friends, the
needs of others, your work and doing the very best you
can, happiness will find you.
9.
I've learned that whenever I decide something with
an open heart, I usually make the right decision.
10. I've
learned that every day you should reach out and touch
someone. People
love that human touch -- holding hands, a warm hug, or just a
friendly pat on the back.
I’m sure
that you can come up with many more statements of your own to
continue the above list. But there is one more that I’ve
saved to the last because it is truly my favourite one of the
entire bunch. Point number 11 in the list is, “I’ve
learned that I still have a lot to learn.” Perhaps that is
one of the true benefits of growing older. You come to realize
that no matter how much you’ve learned about life, there is
still so much more to learn and that is what makes life so
fascinating.
Have a good
week!
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"Some
People Do The Kindest Things
"
November 17, 2008 |
I
was watching a Canada Post television advertisement recently
that was giving direction to parents and children on how to
mail letters to Santa Claus. The promotion also indicated that
EVERY letter sent to Santa will be answered if it contains a
return address.
As I was watching the commercial I thought about the
thousands of children who were going to be thrilled to death
when they receive their letter from Santa. The good people at
Canada Post who are taking care of this initiative must get a
great deal of satisfaction from knowing how much happiness
they are spreading.
That night
I opened up my emails and discovered that my good friend,
Cecile Coutu, had sent me another one of her special stories.
Perhaps it is because I have a four-year old granddaughter
just like the little girl in the story you are about to read.
Perhaps it is because I have always owned a dog and understand
how much it hurts when you watch your pet get sick and die.
Perhaps it is because I had just watched one of those Canada
Post commercials. Whatever the reason, I was deeply touched by
the story and felt that I just had to share it with my
readers.
Understand that in most post offices around the country
there is usually something called a “dead letter office or
box” where letters that have no discernable address end up.
I suspect that there are postal workers just like the one in
this story who end up going through some of the letters to see
if there is any way of delivering them to the proper
recipient.
This story is about a 14 year old dog, Abbey, which
died after a long illness. The day after she died, the
dog’s owner, 4 year old Meredith was crying and talking
about how much she missed her dear pet. She asked
her mother if they could write a letter to God so that when
Abbey got to heaven, God would recognize her. Meredith’s
mother agreed to the request and wrote down the words that
were dictated by her daughter:
Dear God,
Will you
please take care of my dog? She died yesterday and is
with you in heaven. I miss her very much. I am happy that you
let me have her as my dog even though she got sick.
I hope you
will play with her. She likes to play with balls and to swim.
I am sending a picture of her so when you see her You will
know that she is my dog. I really miss her.
Love, Meredith
Meredith
and her mother put the letter in an envelope with a picture of
Abbey and Meredith, and addressed it to God, Heaven. They put
their return address on it.
Then
Meredith pasted several stamps on the front of the envelope
because she said it would take lots of stamps to get the
letter all the way to heaven. That afternoon she dropped it
into the letter box at the post office. A few days later, she
asked if God had gotten the letter yet. Her mother told her
that she thought He would have received it by then.
The next
day, there was a package wrapped in gold paper on the
family’s front porch addressed, 'To Meredith'.
Meredith opened it. Inside was a book by Mr. Rogers
called, 'When a Pet Dies.' Taped to the inside front cover was
the letter that Meredith and her mother had written to God in
its opened envelope. On the opposite page was the picture of
Abbey & Meredith as well as this note:
Dear Meredith,
Abbey
arrived safely in heaven.
Having the
picture was a big help. I recognized Abbey right away.
Abbey isn't
sick anymore. Her spirit is here with me just like it stays in
your heart. Abbey loved being your dog. Since we don't need
our bodies in heaven, I don't have any pockets to keep your
picture in, so I am sending it back to you in this little book
for you to keep and have something to remember Abbey by.
Thank you
for the beautiful letter and thank your mother for helping you
write it and sending it to me. What a wonderful mother you
have. I picked her especially for you.
I send my
blessings every day and remember that I love you very much. By
the way, I'm easy to find, I am wherever there is love.
Love,
God
This apparently is a true story. It is definitely one
of the kindest things I have ever read about.
No one knows who wrote the letter, but there is no
doubt that whoever it was, God was certainly part of her life.
Have a good
week!
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"If
Something Is Worth Doing, It’s Worth Doing Right
"
November 9, 2008 |
At
the outset of this article please let me explain that this is
not a personal political statement, nor should it be
interpreted as my own particular position on the so-called
legacy projects that have caused such a commotion in the
Sudbury
area in
recent weeks. Nonetheless, I have been monitoring the
situation with much more than just a passing interest. I do
have my own personal opinions about this matter but I am not
about to share them in this editorial.
As the time
approached for City Councillors to make a decision on the
Multi-Use Recreation Centre and the Performing Arts Centre I
was quite intrigued with some of the decisions that were made
to “reduce” the overall price tag of the projects. It had
become painfully evident to politicians and City
administrators that public support was quickly diminishing in
light of the $165 million combined cost of the two projects.
These were undoubtedly two highly anticipated developments the
likes of which had never been seen in the Sudbury area and,
despite the cost of the projects, I don’t think there is
anyone who would argue that having these two beautiful
facilities would do the city any harm in terms of our
reputation and image.
However, because of the mounting opposition, measures
were taken to downsize the original plans and thus reduce the
projected cost to $110 million. This, it was felt, would be
far more acceptable to local ratepayers.
All of this reminded me about a story that I like to
use when I want to demonstrate how very important it is for
people to do the best they can in everything they do in life.
I have always believed that if something is worth doing, it is
worth doing right.
The story is about an elderly carpenter who was ready
to retire. He told his employer-contractor of his plans to
leave the house building business and live a more leisurely
life with his wife so that he could enjoy more time with his
extended family. He would miss the paycheck, but he needed to
retire. They could get by.
The
contractor was sorry to see his good worker go and asked if he
could build just one more house as a personal favor. The
carpenter said yes, but in time it was easy to see that his
heart was not in his work. He resorted to shoddy workmanship
and used inferior materials. It was an unfortunate way to end
his career.
When the
carpenter finished his work the employer- contractor came over
to inspect the finished product and handed the front-door key
to the carpenter. "This is your house," he said,
"my gift to you."
What a
shock! What a shame! If he had only known he was building his
own house, he would have done it all so differently. Now he
had to live in the home he had built none too well.
So
when I examined the new cost proposals for the “downsized”
Multi-Use Recreation Centre, I couldn’t help but think about
that poor old carpenter. I couldn’t help but think about all
of the young children living in
Sudbury
today and even those have not yet been born. I even thought
about those proposed projects as I held my newborn grandson,
born a mere three days after the City Council meeting during
which councilors voted 7 to 6 against the projects. Instead of
maintaining the original plan of building a facility of which
we could be proud for decades to come and which would better
satisfy our needs both today and in the future, our “city
planners” decided to put saving money ahead of quality. In
order to do so they decided to take away a full ice pad; take
away the swimming pool; move the facility to a less desirable
location; and downsize the structure in many other ways. In
other words, instead of having a Multi-Use Recreation Centre
that would fulfil all of our dreams and desires, we would be
forcing future generations, including my tiny grandson and his
sisters to “settle” for a building that was much less than
they deserve.
No matter
what your opinion may be about the “legacy projects”, most
of you will undoubtedly agree that when it comes to a
Multi-Use Recreational Centre or a Performing Arts Centre, if
we ever decide to build them, we should do it right the first
time and make sure that they are buildings in which we will be
proud to live for a long, long time. If they are worth doing
at all, they are worth doing right. This is a philosophy of
life that we should all continue to promote in everything we
do.
Have a good
week!
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"It
Doesn’t Take Any Talent To Grow Old"
October 27, 2008 |
I
never really gave much thought about being a member of the
“Baby Boom” generation when I was a young adult. As a
husband, a father and a teacher, I was too busy taking care of
my day to day responsibilities to think much about a
particular philosophy of life that was peculiar to when I was
born. It wasn’t until I made the decision to end my teaching
career over seven years ago that being a member of this
“generation” actually began to mean something to me.
If you talk to people who are between the ages of 44
and 62, you may notice something different about them. Very
seldom do they talk about “retirement” in the traditional
sense of the word. They may talk about “retiring” from the
career they have held for the past 20 or 30 years, but when
you get right down to it, most are simply looking for a
“change”. They are looking for a new adventure that will
allow them to perhaps work on a part-time basis, perhaps out
of their home, in a role that many would not have felt
possible years ago when they were younger. It’s as if
“retirement” is an “escape” from the adulthood prison
we were destined to enter as we grew up.
We constantly hear about people who have begun a new
career or a new hobby or opened up a new business at an age
when most others would be thinking about retirement. The
initial reaction to such news is often one of astonishment
that the person would want to ‘spend so much time and
energy’ during the final stage of his/her life instead of
sitting back and soaking up the sunshine. Often it is easier
for an older person to deny him/herself the pleasure of living
out a dream rather than face the pressures from loved ones who
provide all sorts of advice about ‘how to enjoy
retirement’.
I recall reading an article one day that referred to a
speech that was made to a graduating class by a valedictorian
who was 87 years old. At the age of 84, this courageous woman,
named Rose, decided that before she died she wanted to realize
a life-long dream of earning a degree. Contrary to the advice
of her family and friends who told her that it was ridiculous
for a woman her age to go through all of the trouble of
getting a degree which she would never use in a career, Rose
persisted and four years later, she graduated.
During the course of the four years, Rose became a
campus icon and
she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress
up and she revelled in the attention bestowed upon her from
the other students. She was living it up.
When it came time to graduate, Rose was the unanimous
choice of the class to give the valedictorian speech. She
stood up in front of them, cleared her throat and gave her
fellow classmates some of the best advice they ever received.
“We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow
old because we stop playing. There are only four secrets to
staying young, being happy and achieving success.
First, you have to laugh and find humour every day.
Second, you’ve got to have a dream. When you lose
your dreams, you die. We have so many people walking around
who are dead and don’t even know it.
Third, there is a huge difference between growing older
and growing up. If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed
for one full year and don’t do one productive thing, you
will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven years old and
stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn
eighty-eight. Anybody can grow older. That doesn’t take any
talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding
the opportunity in change.
Finally, have no regrets. The elderly usually don’t
have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not
do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets.”
So the next time you find yourself wondering if you
should work at fulfilling a dream of yours, remember what Rose
said to her graduating class. “It’s never too late to be
all you can possibly be.” A year from now you will still be
a year older. Take advantage of all the opportunities that
come knocking during the next twelve months.
Have a good week.
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"Critical
Moments…
Discovering What Really Matters In Life...
"
October 20, 2008 |
Last
week, Kevin Shanahan, a respected local resident from
Valley
East
who has
established a reputation as an inspirational newspaper
columnist, granted me the honour of appearing as the special
guest on my weekly radio show at CKLU 96.7 FM, broadcast every
Monday night at
6 p.m.
from
Laurentian University. Kevin and I spent the entire two hours
of the program sharing our personal philosophies of life with
the listening audience. We talked about everything under the
sun, but one of the topics that stands out in my mind was
about how, as grandfathers, we are both discovering through
our grandchildren, many of the things that we seem to have
taken for granted as we were raising our own children.
There is an
old saying that if we knew how much fun grandchildren were
going to be, we would have had them first. There are also
people who say that being a grandparent is God’s reward for
being a parent. I never understood what that meant until I
became a grandfather myself. All kidding aside, I must admit
that I am very surprised at how much I am discovering about my
own view about life from observations I am making of my young
grandchildren.
Admittedly, it isn’t really fair to compare grand
parenting with parenting. In the role of parent we find that
we are consumed with career development; with keeping a
healthy relationship with our spouse; with raising our
children; and with all of the other pressures that face young
adults. No wonder most of us find it extremely difficult to
“slow down” and truly appreciate life during this
parenting period. However, there are certain critical points
in your life when you suddenly come face-to-face with the
reality that the most important things in your life are not
things at all. What really matters are the relationships you
have with your loved ones. For me, one of those moments of
awareness took place when I became a grandparent for the first
time and I found that my whole approach to the world around me
changed.
The other
night, after the radio show, I was reflecting upon some of the
things Kevin and I discussed and my thoughts turned to a story
I once read called “The Hymnbook”, written by a man named
Arthur Bowler. I would like to share it with you at this time.
Mr. Bowler wrote
about an incident that occurred during his childhood. “I
watched intently as my little brother was caught in the act.
He sat in the corner of the living room, a pen in one hand and
my father’s hymnbook in the other. As father walked into the
room, my brother cowered slightly. He sensed that he had done
something wrong. From a distance, I saw that he had opened
Dad/s brand-new book and scribbled across the length and
breadth of the entire first page with a pen. Now, staring at
my father fearfully, he and I both waited for his punishment.
My father picked up his prized hymnal, looked at it
carefully, and then sat down without saying a word. Books were
precious to him. He was a pastor and the holder of several
degrees. For him, books were knowledge, and yet, he loved his
children. What he did in the next few minutes was remarkable.
Instead of punishing my brother; instead of scolding or
yelling or reprimanding, he sat down, took the pen from my
brother’s hand and then wrote in the book himself, alongside
the scribbles John had made.
“John’s words in 1959, age two. How many times have
I looked into your beautiful face and into your warm, alert
eyes looking up at me and thanked God for the one who has now
scribbled in my new hymnal? You have made the book sacred, as
have your brothers and sister too so much of my life”
Wow, I thought. This is punishment?
From time to time I take a book down—not just a
cheezy paperback, but a real book that I know I will have for
many years to come—and I give it to one of my children to
‘write’ their names in. As I look at their artwork, I
think of my father, and how he taught me about what really
matters in life: people, not objects; tolerance, not judgement;
and love, which is at the heart of a family. I think about
these things, smile, and I whisper, “Thank you, Dad.”
People, tolerance and love—the things that really
matter in life. Parents have an awesome responsibility to help
their children grow up to show respect to others and to behave
in a socially acceptable manner. We also have a responsibility
to demonstrate by example how to treat all people with
tolerance and love.
Have a good week!
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"Ways
To Keep People Guessing About Your Level of Sanity"
October 13, 2008 |
I’ve met a lot of former students in the seven years since I
retired from my career as an elementary school teacher and I always
find it fascinating to listen to what they remember about being in
my classroom. Many of them remind me about the number of essays and
short stories I made them write. More often than not, however, we
talk about the “learning environment” I was able to create in
the room. We talk about the manner in which I was able to maintain a
consistent level of discipline and respect without coming across as
being heavy-handed and threatening.
When asked to
explain how I was able to maintain control of the classroom for 28
years and yet still be able to make education fun for the most part,
I tell people that I think it had a lot to do with the fact that I
kept my students guessing about my level of sanity.
Yes. You read it
correctly. I didn’t make a mistake. You see my students never
really knew how to take me. We would often engage in learning
activities that were “outside the box”. And from time to time I
would have to appear to “snap” to regain control of students who
were getting out of hand. This ability to change instantly, in a
Jekyl & Hyde kind of way, allowed me to do a lot of things with
my students that were far more fun and interesting than otherwise
suggested. When things began to get a bit out of hand I could
usually regain control of the class because students had a hard time
telling whether I was joking or serious. In fact, there were times
when I had to tell the students to stand up while I repeated a joke
because the first time I told it they were in their seats and the
punch line went right “over their heads”. Some remember how I
would I hand out pencils with no eraser and tell them it was an
experiment to find out how long it would take them to decide which
end to sharpen.
So when I came
across the following list on the internet recently, I knew I just
had to share it with my readers. If you have a good sense of humour
and want to have fun at work (please don’t do things like this at
school or you may get in trouble), try a few of these and let me
know how things turn out.
WAYS TO MAINTAIN YOUR SANITY
1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on
and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom but don’t disguise your
voice. See the reaction.
3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they
want fries with that.
4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it “In”.
5. In the memo field of all of your cheques, write, “For
smuggling diamonds.”
6. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
7. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat. Remember to
keep a serious face.
8. Specify that your drive-through order is “to go”.
9. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play
tropical sounds all day.
10. When money comes out of the ATM, scream, “I won! I won!
I’m sure many of you have other ideas that would
produce the same results as the above. If you have any you would
like to share, please send them to The Vision and perhaps I can
publish “List #2” before Christmas.
The bottom line
is that life is too precious to take seriously all the time. It is
important for all of us to have a few healthy strategies for dealing
with day to day stress. Every now and then we just have to do
something that keeps people on their toes. Ask your waitress how
much your next pizza costs per square inch. The next time you are
walking on a busy street corner stare into the sky and see how many
others do the same as they walk by.
The next time you are in a crowded elevator, face the back
instead of the door. Just remember that there is nothing wrong with
“keeping people guessing about your level of sanity.” It makes
life a whole lot more interesting.
Have a good
week!
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"Time
For Quiet Reflection This Weekend As We Give Thanks" October
6, 2008 |
Thanksgiving has always been
one of my favourite holidays. Even though it has traditionally been
a weekend when I try to put everything in the yard away for the
winter in preparation for the long cold months ahead, I find I still
have time to do a lot of reflection about my own life and the things
about my life that I have to be thankful for.
Every year as I approach Thanksgiving Weekend I recall a
little story that illustrates just how easy it is to take the things
we have for granted. Let me share this story with you before I make
a few comments afterwards.
“One day a father of a very wealthy family took his son on
a trip to the country with the firm purpose of showing his son how
poor some people can be. They spent a couple of days and
nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor
family.
On their return from the country, the father asked his
son how he liked the trip. The son replied, “It was great, Dad.”
“Did you see how poor people can be?” the father asked.
“Oh, yeah,” said the son.
“So what did you learn from the trip?” asked the father.
The son answered, “I saw that we have one dog and they had
four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our back yard and
they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lanterns in our
garden and they have the stars at night. Our patio reaches to the
front yard and they have the whole horizon. We have a small piece of
land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight. We
have servants who serve us, but they serve each other. We buy our
food, but they grow theirs. We have walls around our property to
protect us; they have friends to protect them.”
With this the boy’s father was speechless.
Then his son added, “Thanks dad for showing me how poor we
are.”
I love this story! It reminds me of the number of times I
have been guilty of overlooking all of the good things I have in my
life and instead concentrating on what I don’t have? I’m sure
this applies to all of my readers in some ways.
We’re obviously aware that one person’s worthless object
is another’s prize possession. Just look at the yard sales in the
summer. Thousands of people go from one yard sale to another finding
treasures that others are willing to part with. Value is all based
on one’s perspective. In
the story, the father thought he was the rich person with all that
his wealth could buy. However, in the eyes of his son, the family on
the farm had things that were of immense value. They were the
wealthy family.
This weekend I am going to spend a few moments in quiet
reflection about what is truly important to me. I extend an
invitation to all of my readers to do the same. Make a list of all
the things in your life that you could live without. Be honest and
true to your self. For example, if, for some reason, you were taken
off the face of the earth today, what would you miss the most?
We have all accumulated many possessions over the years, but
when all is said and done, I think you will discover that what you
would miss the most are not things at all. You will miss the people
in your life and the loving relationships you developed most of all.
The expensive cars, clothes and houses will mean nothing when you
look back on your life. What you will miss the most are your loved
ones. The people who truly care about you and the people with whom
you look forward to sharing your precious moments on this earth.
And so as we head into Thanksgiving Weekend, let’s all take
a little bit of time to look at the things in our life that others
would consider valuable but for which we may have long taken for
granted. Let’s also spend some time looking closely at the people
around us and see what “makes their life so rich”.
Above all, let’s all show appreciation for the parts of our
life that we would miss the most if they were taken away from us.
And let’s tell the people who are closest to us just how much we
appreciate their love.
Have a good week!
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"Valley
East
…
The
Town Where People Are Free To Follow Their Own Path"
September 29, 2008 |
I had an
interesting phone interview last week with a young man named Maxwell
Leighton. Max is a writer for a local quarterly magazine.
He is currently working on a feature article about
Valley East
. We spoke for
about an hour, discussing the history of the community and touching
upon some of the main characteristics that make Valley East such a
special place to live.
Max grew up in
Southern Ontario
, but he spends
a lot of time in the Hanmer area. As such, he has been developing a
fondness and appreciation of what the Town of
Valley East
has to offer
from an outsider’s perspective.
In fact, he sincerely believes that he would one day like to
call
Valley East
his home.
We spoke a lot about the positive things that
Valley East
has to offer to
all age groups from all walks of life. In my attempt to try to
define what it is specifically that makes
Valley East
so attractive,
I simply had to tell Max that our greatest strength as a community
is that we allow everyone living here to “define themselves”. In
other words, we don’t force people to fit into any one particular
life style. We allow
people to develop their own personal identity and character in a
very comfortable, secure and accepting environment.
Valley
East is a great place to raise a family; a great place to start a
business; a great place for finding satisfaction in recreational,
cultural or sports fields; in other words, it is a great place to
grow and develop, regardless of your personal preferences or goals.
Growth also means progress. If you are looking to improve yourself
spiritually, intellectually, psychologically, socially, culturally,
physically – or in any other way you can think of, Valley East
will offer you that opportunity to achieve your goals and dreams.
Moreover,
Valley East
is a place
where you can grow and discover your own passions in life without
feeling that you are being forced to conform to a pre-determined
“identity”.
Valley East
therefore is a
community of individuals, each with the freedom to develop their own
particular personality. That is in fact our true identity! Valley
East is a community that doesn’t define the individuals who live
here; the individuals who live here define
Valley East
!
After we finished
our interview, I hung up the phone and recalled a story I like to
tell young people who feel that they can find something better than
what Valley East has to offer.
The story is called, “The Golden Windows”.
There was once a
young boy living on a farm which seemed like it was so far away from
everywhere. He needed to get up before sunrise every morning to
start his chores and then go out again later to do the evening ones.
During sunrise he would take a break and climb up on the fence so in
the distance he could see the house with golden windows. He thought
how great it would be to live there and his mind would wander to
imagine the modern equipment and appliances that might exist in the
house.
"If they can
afford golden windows, then they must have other nice things
too." He promised himself that some day he would go there and
see this wonderful place for himself.
Then one morning
his father told him he could take the day off and stay home to play
while his father did the chores around the farm. Knowing that this
was his chance, he packed a sandwich and headed across the field
towards the house with the golden windows.
As the afternoon
went on, he began to realize how he had misjudged the distance, but
something else was also very wrong. As he approached the house, he
saw no golden windows, but instead a place with a broken down fence.
He went to the tattered screen door and knocked. A boy very close to
his own age opened the door.
He asked him if
he has seen the house with the golden windows. The boy said,
"Sure, I know." and invited him to sit on the porch. As he
sat there, he looked back from where he just came where the sunset
turned the windows on his own home to Gold.
The message in
this story is pretty clear. Regardless of your age or personal
circumstance, what appears in life to be "golden" is
sometimes just an illusion. You may not realize it, but there are a
lot of things about living in
Valley East
that people in other places would love. To them, you are the lucky
ones. You have everything they are looking for - all you have to do
is look at things the right way.
In the story, the
first boy saw the sun reflecting on the distant windows each
morning. To him, that was the place where all the riches lie. To the
other boy, who saw the sun reflecting on the first boy’s windows
as the sun set in the evening that was where the riches must surely
lie. It’s all a matter of perception.
I want to thank
Max for contacting me by phone last week and helping me see my own
“golden windows” right here in
Valley East
.
Have
a good week! |
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"Never
Be Too Busy To Respond With Kindness
And Compassion To Strangers" September
22, 2008 |
Just the other day I was walking through the mall on my way
to a meeting when a stranger stopped me and asked for directions to
one of the local churches. The hallway was crowded and there were
many people she could have approached, but she picked me out of the
crowd over all of the others. After I provided her with the
information she was looking for, I continued on my way to the
meeting. I was three minutes later than I had been before stopping
to help out this stranger, but I felt a whole lot better about
myself. I also realized that even though I was the one helping this
stranger, in her own way she also had a profound impact on me.
The incident
reminded me about a story I read several years ago. As you read the
story, keep in mind the saying made famous by a former country music
singer, “There is no such thing as a stranger, just a friend I
haven’t met.”
It was a bitter, cold evening in northern
Virginia
many years
ago. The old man’s beard was glazed by winter’s frost while he
waited for a ride across the river. The wait seemed endless. His
body became numb and stiff from the frigid north wind.
He heard the faint, steady rhythm of approaching hooves galloping
along the frozen path. Anxiously, he watched as several horsemen
rounded the bend. He let the first one pass by without an effort to
get his attention. Then another passed by, and another. Finally, the
last rider neared the spot where the old man sat like a snow statue.
As this one drew near, the old man caught the rider’s eye and
said, “Sir, would you mind giving an old man a ride to the other
side? There doesn’t appear to be a passageway by foot.”
Reining his horse, the rider replied, “Sure thing. Hop
aboard.” Seeing the old man was unable to lift his half-frozen
body from the ground, the horseman dismounted and helped the old man
onto the horse. The horseman took the old man not just across the
river, but to his destination, which was just a few miles away.
As they neared the tiny but cozy cottage, the horseman’s
curiosity caused him to inquire, “Sir, I notice that you let
several other riders pass by without making an effort to secure a
ride. Then I came up and you immediately asked me for a ride. I’m
curious why, on such a bitter winter night; you would wait and ask
the last rider. What if I had refused and left you there?
The old man lowered himself slowly down from the horse,
looked the rider straight in the eyes, and replied. “I’ve been
around these here parts for some time. I reckon I know people pretty
good.” The old-timer continued, “I looked into the eyes of the
other riders and immediately saw there was no concern for my
situation. It would have been useless even to ask them for a ride.
But when I looked into your eyes, kindness and compassion were
evident. I knew, then and there, that your gentle spirit would
welcome the opportunity to give me assistance in my time of need.”
Those heartwarming comments touched the horseman deeply.
“I’m most grateful for what you have said,” he told the old
man. “May I never get too busy in my own affairs that I fail to
respond to the needs of others with kindness and compassion.”
It made me feel special inside to know that out of all of the
other people in the hallway that day, a stranger ‘knew’ that if
she stopped me I would likely help her. She felt confident enough to
step forward and reach out to me – none of the others. For the
remainder of the day I kept thinking about what the old man had said
in the story, “When I looked into your eyes, kindness and
compassion were evident. I knew, then and there, that your gentle
spirit would welcome the opportunity to give me assistance in my
time of need.” I hope
I never lose that look of kindness and compassion. Nor do I ever
want strangers to feel uncomfortable about approaching me for help.
As you go about
your business the rest of the week, use your eyes to talk to the
people you meet. Show them that you care, even if ever so slightly.
The person at the counter of the corner store; the carry-out person
at the grocery store; the parking lot attendant; and any other
person, young or old, male or female, who happens to cross paths
with you for any reason, are all just “friends you have not
met”. Show them with your eyes that you respect them and make them
feel like they too have met a new friend. Make them understand that
you “welcome the opportunity to give them assistance in their time
of need.”
Have a good week!
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"Uncommon
Decency Is All Around Us If We Look Hard Enough" September
15, 2008 |
It is
easy to become disillusioned about the world in which we live if you
watch too much television or read too many newspapers with the
emphasis on our weaknesses as a human race, and our inability to
treat one another with common decency. Everyone seems to be in a
constant battle for supremacy where there no rules, only survivors
– winners and losers.
And yet, if we
look hard enough we can all find examples of what I call “uncommon
decency”. These are examples of people helping each other and
looking out for each other with no expectation of getting anything
in return other than the satisfaction of knowing that you are making
a difference. If you turn off the television and take the time to
truly observe other human beings in action, it will surprise you to
learn that this truly is a great world in which we live and that
there are wonderful people all around who do reach out to others
with a level of care and commitment that is too often overshadowed
by the high profile negative elements that we have come to expect
through the media.
I want to share a story
I have in my files that demonstrates just what I mean. This is about
a young lady named Sara Tucholsky, a 5-foot-2-inch softball
player who was in her senior year for
Western
Oregon
University
. She was playing in a big game with
Central
Washington
University
. Both teams were vying for the Division II NCAA playoffs. Sara, who
was batting less than .200 all season, hit the ball over the fence
with two runners on.
She had never hit
a ball out of the park before, even in practice. She was so excited,
she missed first base. Realizing this, she turned to go back but
collapsed in agony as her knee gave out. Her first-base coach yelled
that she had to crawl back to first base because if anyone on Sara's
team touched her, she'd be out and her home run would be nullified.
Her coach encouraged her to try to crawl around the other bases to
preserve her home run, but it was out of the question.
That's when the
star player on the other team, Mallory Holtman, asked the umpire if
she and a teammate could carry Sara around the bases. It was an
unprecedented request from an opponent fighting for a playoff berth,
but the rules allowed it. Without hesitation, Mallory and shortstop
Liz Wallace lifted Sara and carried her, lowering her to touch each
base with her good leg.
To Mallory it was
simple: "In the end, it's not about winning and losing so much;
it was about this girl. She hit it over the fence and was in pain
and deserved a home run."
Mallory was
right. It's just common decency.
Sadly, such
kindness isn't common at all in sports, and that's why all the
coaches, players, and spectators who were stunned by this
spontaneous act of sportsmanship wept. And that's how Mallory became
a national hero. By the way, her team lost 4-2, but in my eyes,
everyone won.
Closer to home,
my daughter-in-law, Angele, told us that just the other day she was
preparing my granddaughter for her first day of school by bringing
her to the edge of the driveway so she could see the school bus go
by in the morning. This was the same bus she would be taking in a
couple of days. They noticed a young girl a few houses down, crying
and holding on to her mother, begging to stay home. As the little
girl finally was put on the bus, still crying, my four-year old
granddaughter, who herself had never ridden on one of these huge
vehicles, turned to Angele and said, “Don’t worry mom. I will
help her feel better when I go on the bus.”
The story about
Mallory and her teammate helping an opponent in need and the words
from my four-year old grandchild give me the strength and
inspiration to go forward in my own life, in search of opportunities
to demonstrate “uncommon decency” to others. Perhaps if we all
look for ways to reach out to others in the same way we can go back
to the future when decency wasn’t uncommon at all.
Have a good week!
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"Wow!
My Granddaughter Is Going
to School Already" September
9, 2008 |
This may be a very stressful time of year for many parents
who are sending their young children off to school for the first
time. As a parent myself who was also a teacher, I never really felt
a great deal of anxiety when my own children started school. After
all, I had other things to worry about what with getting my own
class in order.
But let me tell
you, as a grandfather, witnessing my oldest granddaughter take her
first step into that world of formal education, it is the most
frightening thing I have ever been through. So if parents feel the
same way, I can certainly relate.
It’s not that I
have any doubt about the abilities of the teachers at her school.
She is going to be in the best of care as she begins Junior
Kindergarten. I even know her teacher and her principal personally
and it is a marvelous school she will be attending. It’s just that
I am fully aware that she is now entering a “system” that for
the next 18 or more years will be having a significant impact on
molding her into a young adult. Moreover,
it is system from which she cannot escape and which will require her
to go through so many emotional and personal challenges as she tries
to tries to discover her true passions in life.
As I think about
my granddaughter beginning school I can’t help thinking about an
article I once read about processionary caterpillars.
Processionary
caterpillars travel in long, twisting lines, one creature behind the
other. A famous social scientist once lead a group of these
caterpillars on to the rim of a large flowerpot so that the leader
of the procession eventually found itself nose to tail with the last
caterpillar in the procession, forming a circle without end or
beginning.
Through sheer
force of habit and, of course, instinct, the ring of caterpillars
circled the flowerpot for seven days and seven nights, until they
died from exhaustion and starvation. An ample supply of food was
close at hand and plainly visible for all to see, but it was outside
the range of the circle, so the caterpillars continued along the
beaten path until they all died.
Now I realize it
is hard to get emotional about a small group of caterpillars that
were unable to see that the key to their survival was simply a
matter of breaking out of the line and moving over to the food that
was within sight. However, the really sad thing about this article
is that human beings often behave in a similar manner. Habit
patterns and ways of thinking become so deeply entrenched that it
seems easier and more comforting to follow them than to cope with
change and uncertainty, even when that change may give you a good
chance for freedom, achievement, and success.
It's extremely
difficult for most people to accept that only a small minority of
people ever really develop a true vision about life, about living
abundantly and successfully. For some strange reason most people are
content to wait passively for success to come to them - like the
caterpillars going around in circles, waiting for sustenance,
following nose to tail - living as other people are living in the
unspoken, implied assumption that other people somehow know more
than you about how to live successfully. The older you get the more
you realize that most other people, especially people who are deemed
to be experts in their field, “don’t have a clue”. They are
simply blindly following, nose-to-tail, just like the processionary
caterpillar.
And so as my
granddaughter begins the first step in a journey that will last at
least 18 years, my only hope is that the teachers to whom she is
entrusted have the confidence to break out of the line every now and
then to help her develop her own true vision of life. I hope her
journey does not go the way of the processionary caterpillar.
I truly believe
that you can achieve anything you want in life if you have the
courage to dream it, the intelligence to make a realistic plan, and
the will to see that plan through to the end. This is what I hope my
granddaughter learns while she is going to school. This is the
essence of all learning and education. This is the legacy of all
good teachers.
Have
a good week!
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“Choosing
A Life That Matters August
18, 2008 |
Please allow me to share a little passage with you that I
have found helpful in keeping things that happen in my life in their
proper perspective. I like to look at this short verse whenever I
need motivation in dealing with circumstances that may be holding me
back from my dream of living a life that truly matters. I have not
been able to identify the author, but I am sure he/she will be happy
to know that it is being used to help other people in this world.
Ready or not, some day it will all come
to an end.
There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours, or days.
All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten,
will pass to someone else. Your wealth, fame, and temporal
power will shrivel to irrelevance. It will not matter what you
owned or what you were owed. Your grudges, resentments,
frustrations, and jealousies will finally disappear. So too
your hopes, ambitions, plans, and to-do lists will expire. The
wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.
It won't matter where you came from or what side of the tracks
you lived on at the end. It won't matter whether you were
beautiful or brilliant. Even your gender and skin color will
be irrelevant. So
what will matter? How will the value of your days be measured?
What will matter is not what you bought, but what you built.
Not what you got, but what you gave.
What will matter is not your success, but your significance.
What will matter is not what you learned, but what you taught.
What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion,
courage, or sacrifice that enriched, empowered, or encouraged
others to emulate your example.
What will matter is not your competence, but your character.
What will matter is not how many people you knew, but how many
will feel a lasting loss when you're gone.
What will matter is not your memories, but the memories that
live in those who loved you.
What will matter is how long you will be remembered, by whom,
and for what.
Living a life that matters doesn't happen by accident.
It's not a matter of circumstance but of choice.
Choose to live a life that matters.
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George Bernard Shaw said, "People are always blaming
circumstance for what they are. I do not believe in circumstance.
The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and
look for the circumstance they want and if they can't find them they
make them."
I once heard a
motivational speaker named Bob Proctor explain that, “Successful
people use circumstances to catapult them on toward their goal,
while the masses use them as road blocks. A circumstance may cause a
detour in your life but you should never permit it to stop you.”
Over the years I
can honestly say that the greatest obstacle to achieving success for
many people I came in contact with came down to the use of the
circumstances of their life as an excuse for not following their
dreams. And yet, I have also witnessed many people turn those very
same circumstances around into something positive and find ways to
accomplish their goals. It all boils down to the making a simple
decision. You just have to set your goal and then find a way to get
it done.
The first thing I
do when I have an opportunity to work with young students in high
school, college or university is ask them to describe what they
would like to do with their life after they finish up with their
formal education. It is imperative that they choose the type of
career they would like to pursue so that they have something on
which to focus.
I learned long
ago that no matter what your age, or what your situation in life, if
you don’t have a goal, nothing else matters. It’s like saying
that you want to go on a vacation but you don’t know where you
would like to go. Once you decide where you want to go it is easy to
determine what you must do to get there. Without a destination you
can spend the entire trip traveling in the wrong direction and be
further away from your eventual destination.
It’s the same
way with everything that is important in life. Once you make a
decision; once you know what you want to do and where you would like
to end up, you can use the circumstances of your life to help
achieve your goals. We all have it in us to be successful. All we
have to do is make a choice and then go for it.
Have a good week!
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“The
Brownie Recipe
” July
21, 2008 |
Being a
parent is one of the toughest jobs in the world. The older your
children get the more challenges you face in the establishment of an
acceptable level of standards for your family while the rest of the
world seems to be adopting an “anything goes” way of life. So
when the following story came across my desk the other day I
immediately knew I had to share it with all fellow parents,
grandparents and teachers who read this column. If you are a
teenager, my advice is that you hide this copy of The Vision Paper
from your parents or you will never win another argument with them
again.
The story is called, “The Brownie Recipe”. |
A father of some
teenage children had the family rule that they could not attend
PG-13, R or X rated movies. His three teens wanted to see a
particular popular movie that was playing at local theaters. It was rated
PG-13.
The teens
interviewed friends and even some members of their family's church
to find out what was offensive in the movie. The teens made a list
of pros and cons about the movie to use to convince their dad that
they should be allowed to see it.
The cons were:
It
contained ONLY 3 swear words! The ONLY violence was a building
exploding (and you see that on TV all the time they said). You
actually did not 'see' the couple in the movie having sex. It was just
implied sex, off camera.
The pros were:
It
was a popular movie, (a blockbuster). Everyone was seeing it. If the
teens saw the movie then they would not feel left out when their friends
discussed it. The movie contained a good story and plot. It had some
great adventure and suspense in it. There were some fantastic
special effects in this movie. The movie's stars were some of the
most talented actors in
Hollywood
. It probably would be nominated for several awards. Many members of
their Christian church, including the pastor, had even seen the
movie and said it wasn't really 'that bad'.
Therefore, since
there were more pros than cons the teens asked their father to
reconsider his position on just this ONE movie and let them have
permission to go see it.
The father looked
at the list and thought for a few minutes He said he could tell his
children had spent some time and thought on this request. He asked
if he could have a day to think about it before making his decision.
The teens were
thrilled, thinking; 'Now we've got him! Our argument is too good!
Dad can't turn us down!' So, they happily agreed to let him have
a day to think about their request.
The next evening
the Father called his three teenagers, who were smiling smugly, into
the living room. There on the coffee table he had a plate of
brownies. The teens were puzzled. The father told his children he
had thought about their request and had decided that if they would
eat the brownies, then he would let them go to the movie. But, he
explained, just like the movie, the brownies had pros and cons.
The pros were:
They
were made with the finest chocolate and other good ingredients. They
had the added special effect of yummy walnuts in them. The brownies
were moist and fresh with wonderful chocolate frosting on top. He
had made these fantastic brownies using an award-winning recipe. And
best of all, the brownies had been made lovingly by the hand of
their own father.
The brownies only
had one con:
He
had included a little bit of a special ingredient: the brownies
contained just a small amount of dog poop. But he had mixed the
dough well and they probably would not even be able to taste the dog
poop and he had baked it at 350 degrees so hopefully any bacteria or
germs from the dog poop had probably been destroyed.
Therefore, if any
of his children could stand to eat the brownies which included just
a 'little bit of crap' and not be affected by it, then he knew they
would also be able to see the movie with 'just a little bit of smut'
and not be affected.
Of course, none
of the teens would eat the brownies and the smug smiles had left
their faces. Now when his teenagers ask permission to do something
he KNOWS THEY SHOULDN'T BE DOING the father just asks, 'Would you
like me to whip up a batch of my special brownies?'
I think this
story speaks for itself. I encourage all parents to keep a copy of
this handy and use it when needed.
Have a good week!
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“
Knowing
Where To Look Comes From Years of Experience
” July
14, 2008 |
Hardly
a week goes by without at least one person telling me how lucky I am
to be retired. Then I tell them what I am doing with my time and
they quickly understand that the word “retired” is not in my
vocabulary. In fact, I feel as do many other people of my
generation, that our traditional retirement years are going to
become the true “defining period” for the baby boomers as they
emerge from their “primary careers” and enter what I like to
refer to as the “age of significance” . This is going to be a
time of their life when older adults who are over the age of 50 will
truly be appreciated for the knowledge, wisdom and experience they
have accumulated.
I often recall the story about the head office of a large
national company that had problems with its computer network system
a few years ago. Something went wrong with the network one day and
no one in the office could find the problem. The IT department tried
everything possible and still the system couldn’t be restored. Not
only were the existing files unable to be accessed, the staff
couldn’t communicate with other business clients and the company
was losing $250,000 a day in revenue while their computers were out
of commission.
The Office Manager contacted several computer consulting
companies and one by one they came in to look at the system and were
equally baffled at the problem. No one, it seemed, could come up
with the solution and get the system back up and running.
Then in one final attempt, the Office Manager called the
phone number of a “retired” computer engineer who had decided to
open up a little business and run it on a part-time basis out of his
home. This individual did not have the resources of some of the
larger companies that had been unsuccessful in solving the problem,
but the computers had been down for four days and had cost the
company over $1 million in lost revenue by this time. The Office
Manager was desperate and so as a last resort called the older
consultant.
The “retired” computer engineer arrived and was shown the
system. He examined the master control room and then walked directly
over and unplugged one of the computers in the main office.
Immediately the entire network system was back on line and working
properly allowing everyone to get back to work.
He went up to the Office Manager and said, “Get rid of that
computer and you won’t have any more problems.”
Three days later the Office Manager received an invoice from
the consultant in the amount of $10,000. The Manager was furious at
the ridiculous amount of the bill and demanded an explanation as to
why the bill was so high for less than 20 minutes of work. The
consultant agreed to revise the invoice and itemize the charges.
A couple of days later the Office Manager received another
invoice with the total amount broken down as follows. “$100 for
making the trip to your office to do the repairs; $9,900 for knowing
where to look.” Total charge of $10,000.
I think this story is a perfect explanation of the value
older adults will provide to society in the decades to come. You
can’t teach experience. It is something that you earn and
accumulate over time. In my own case I find I am able to take on so
many different things right now precisely because for the past 58
years I have been learning “where to look” and “what to do”.
I find I can get a lot more done than I could when I was younger
simply because of the knowledge, wisdom and experience I have
collected over the years.
Most baby boomers and older adults are capable of the same.
That is why so many of them taking on part-time jobs and new careers
at an age which is traditionally known for “retirement”. A life
of travelling, golf, fishing and relaxing is being replaced with a
life of significance and fulfillment as older adults are able to put
their wisdom to work. We are a generation that doesn’t have to
work harder – we work smarter!
The message for the younger generation is clear. Learn from
the years of experience of the older adults around you. The future
that awaits will be more demanding upon that one precious commodity
that can’t be increased or produced artificially – TIME. And the
people who will be able to get the most out of their time are the
ones who “know where to look” and “what to do”. You can
learn a lot from older adults if you know how to listen.
Have a good week! |
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“
Applying
The Chaos Theory To Life…
” July
7, 2008 |
Edward Lorenz was a 90-year old professor at the Michigan
Institute of Technology who died this past spring. The associated
press, when reporting his death, stated, “Professor Lorenz’s
discovery of “deterministic chaos” brought about one of the most
dramatic changes in mankind’s view of nature since Sir Isaac
Newton discovered gravity.” Dr. Lorenz received the 1991 Kyoto
Prize for basic sciences.
Dr. Lorenz became
known as the father of the famed “chaos theory” in the 1960’s
when he came up with the concept that small effects lead to big
changes. He called this the “butterfly effect”. His theory
explained how something as minuscule as a butterfly flapping its
wings in
Brazil
changes the constantly moving atmosphere in ways that could trigger
tornados in
Texas
. Meteorologists today base many of their forecasts on his
techniques.
As the story
goes, Dr. Lorenz inadvertently ran what seemed like the same
calculations through a computer twice and came up with vastly
different answers. When he tried to figure out what happened, he
noticed that a slight decimal point change – less than 0.0001 –
wound up leading to a significant error. That error led to his
theory of the butterfly effect.
The concept of
small changes turning into big effects influenced many basic
sciences, but it also explained a lot about relationships, sports
and many other things that occur in life.
Even something
like a simple smile affects the behaviour of both the sender and the
receiver. The person doing the smiling may just be expressing a
friendly gesture, yet to the receiver it may mean a whole lot more;
it may even change a person’s whole outlook on life knowing that
someone actually cares enough to smile at them.
Small things
always make a difference in sports. How the pitcher holds the seams
of the ball on his fingers will affect the delivery, movement, and
speed of the ball differently than if he doesn’t hold the seams.
He could throw a two-seam fastball, a slider, or a splitter
depending upon his ever so slight adjustments.
This small
difference in how the ball is held will dramatically affect the
batter’s behavior once the ball crosses the plate. If the batter
connects, the behavior of the outfield changes. The base runners
will stay or go. Umpires will quickly move to different positions on
the field. Thousands in the stand will scream, stand, cheer, or
moan. And it all started with how the pitcher gripped the seams of
the ball. Small things make a difference.
As individuals,
we should always be looking for ways to apply the ‘chaos theory’
or more commonly known as the ‘butterfly effect’ in our day to
day activities. At work, should you make one more sales call before
calling it a day? Should you comment on how nice the store clerk’s
new uniform looks or keep it to yourself and say nothing? Should you
go to your child’s open house or spend the time cleaning the
dishes? Should you send one more email to a friend you haven’t
contacted in months or should you wait for her to contact you first?
Should you answer the phone or let the answering machine get the
message and check it out later on? Should you phone your own parents
today, or put it off until you have more time?
These all seem
like small, miniscule things at the time and often seem like they
would have no more effect on your life than a butterfly flapping its
wings. However, one thing always leads to another. Then another. And
another. You change your own behavior whenever you act. But you also
change the behaviors, knowledge, and goals of others by your
butterfly actions. Small things lead to big results down the road.
So the next time
you find yourself wondering if what you are doing will have any
effect on the total outcome of your life or the lives of others,
just remember Dr. Lorenz and the butterfly wings. No matter what you
do; no matter how insignificant an action may seem to you at the
time, it is going to have a huge impact on the rest of your life and
on the rest of the lives of those people around you. Don’t take
anything you say or do lightly. Everything you do or say is
important, so make sure that the impact of your actions and words
create the kind of ‘chaos’ that will have positive results.
Have a good week!
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“
We
Are All Being Used For A Higher Purpose In This Life…” June
30, 2008 |
The
summer vacation period has officially arrived! We are now into the
month of July and for many of us it means that we can slow down and
relax a bit as we reflect upon a few of the more important
philosophical questions of the day. Questions such as "What is
the meaning of all of this? Where is it leading to? What difference
am I making?"
Whenever I
find myself asking those questions, I recall the story about a man
who worked as a carpenter during the Great Depression. One day, he
was building some crates for the clothes his church was sending to
an orphanage in
China
. On his way
home, he reached into his shirt pocket to find his glasses, but they
were gone. When he mentally replayed his earlier actions, he
realized what had happened. The glasses had slipped out of his
pocket unnoticed and fallen into one of the crates, which he had
nailed shut. His brand new glasses were now heading for
China
!
The carpenter had six
children. He had spent $20 for those glasses that very morning. He
was upset by the thought of having to buy another pair, especially
during the height of the depression. "It's not fair," he
told God as he drove home in frustration. "I've been very
faithful in giving of my time and money to your work, and now
this...”
Several months
later, the director of the orphanage was on furlough in the
United States
. He wanted to
visit all the churches that supported him in
China
, so he came to
speak one Sunday at the carpenter's church. The missionary began by
thanking the people for their faithfulness in supporting the
orphanage. "But most of all," he said, "I must thank
the people of this parish for the glasses you sent last year. You
see, the Communists had just swept through the orphanage, destroying
everything, including my glasses. I was desperate. Even if I had the
money, there was simply no way of replacing those glasses. Along
with not being able to see well, I experienced headaches every day,
so my coworkers and I were much in prayer about this. Then your
crates arrived. When my staff removed the covers, they found a pair
of glasses lying on top."
The missionary
paused long enough to let his words sink in. Then, still gripped
with the wonder of it all, he continued. "Folks, when I tried
on the glasses, it was as though they had been custom-made just for
me! I want to thank you for being a part of that."
The people
listened, happy for the miraculous glasses. But the missionary
surely must have confused their church with another, they thought.
There were no glasses on their list of items to be sent overseas.
But sitting quietly in the back, with tears streaming down his face,
an ordinary carpenter realized the Master Carpenter had used him in
an extraordinary way.
The truth is that
we are all being used by the Master Carpenter in extraordinary ways
of which we may never ever be aware. Imagine how often you may have
done something which had a profound affect upon the life of someone
else; something of which you had no idea, much like the carpenter in
the story. If the missionary had never visited the
United States
, the carpenter
would never have known what a difference his lost glasses made.
Things like this happen all the time. Giving directions to a
stranger which helps him get to his destination safely; helping an
elderly woman carry out her grocery bags; consoling a friend who has
just lost a loved one; smiling at the attendant at the take-out
window; and many other little things that we take for granted. Who
knows what may have happened to the stranger if he had become lost;
to the elderly woman if she had fallen down and broken a leg; to the
friend who felt as if there was nothing left to live for; or to the
attendant at the take-out window who was feeling the tremendous
pressures of having to work two or three jobs to support her young
baby.
You never know
just how the Master Carpenter works. But you do know how often
people in your life have made a difference, and how you felt when
you were on the receiving end. And just think of how often the
person who reached out to you had absolutely no idea just how much
their act of kindness meant to you. Well, you too reach out to
others, and you too, often do so without realizing the full value of
your gesture.
So, next time you
are feeling a bit philosophical and wonder if you are making any
kind of difference in this world, just remember the Carpenter's
glasses, and remind yourself that you are being used in
extraordinary ways to provide a real service to the people in your
life. You may not know it, but you are definitely making a
difference and it does matter that you are here on this earth.
Have a good week!
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“Preparing
For The Rain...” June
23, 2008 |
Summer vacation is now
into full swing for all students in secondary and post-secondary
schools of the Greater Sudbury Area. For many, this time away from
their studies provides them with an opportunity to pave the way for
a great future. This editorial will be of particular interest to all
students who have summer jobs as well as all parents of those
children. It will also bring back memories for everyone else who can
remember the first job they ever had.
As I was going through some old photos recently, I came
across a picture of myself in my back yard at Lively the day I
received my first pay from my very first summer job. I was 17 years
old at the time and was hired as a labourer for McConnell & Sons
Pipe Fitters. We were working at the INCO smelter in Copper Cliff.
With that particular company we were paid in cash every Friday, so
you may be able to make out the wad of bills in my hand. I
don’t think I ever worked so hard or got so dirty in any other job
I have ever held. Perhaps that was the summer I decided to become a
teacher.
The photo reminded me of a story about two farmers who were
praying for rain during a particularly dry spell one summer. They
were both very devout Christians and felt that if they prayed hard
enough, God would help them by providing enough rain for them to
grow enough food on which to survive during the winter. Every
morning the two farmers would meet at the Church to pray. Then they
would return to their respective farms. The first farmer would sit
on the porch in his rocking chair, looking into the sky for clouds
that might signal the end of the drought. The second farmer would
spend the entire day “preparing his soil” for the rain. He
wanted everything to be ready for when God answered their prayers
and delivered the rain. Which farmer do you think God helped the
most?
My grandmother’s favourite saying was, “God helps those
who help themselves. Pray as if everything depends upon God, but act
as if everything depends upon you.” Both farmers prayed to God to
get help in the form of rain, but only one of them actually went out
and prepared for the rain.
Students who have summer jobs are all in fact preparing for
“rain” that will one day take them to a bright and prosperous
future by developing on-the-job transferable skills that will remain
with them forever. It doesn’t matter how much research you do
about a career. It doesn’t matter how many courses you take at
college or university. It doesn’t matter how many books you read.
NOTHING, and I mean NOTHING will mean as much to your future
happiness and satisfaction as an individual as the experience you
gain from your summer jobs.
If you are a parent with a child who is fortunate enough to
have a summer job, show him/her this editorial and talk about the
summer jobs you had when you were young. Share your experiences and
help your child understand just how important your summer jobs were
in the development of who you are now. Make your child understand
that it is up to him/her to prepare his/her own “field” for the
time when the “rain will surely come”, just like the farmer in
the story. If
you just sit back and wait for your future to arrive on its own, you
are no better than the farmer looking up into the cloudless sky.
When the rains finally do come, the farmer won’t be ready.
So no matter what kind of summer job you may have this year,
remember that you only get out of this life what you put into it.
Use the time to learn everything you can about responsibility and
commitment. Prepare the way for your future and you will be ready
when the rain comes to help you grow into all you can be.
Have a good week!
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“We
Are Stronger When We Work Together” June
16, 2008 |
The
title of this week’s “reflection” may seem a bit obvious. Of
course we all know that we are stronger when we work together, but
if that is the case, then why don’t we do it more often.
Last week I
watched Phil Landry of Nature’s Haven Parkland Estates &
Condominiums talk to reporters during the media event that was held
to introduce his residential project to the general public. You can
find a story about the event in another section of this week’s
Vision Paper so I won’t go into all of the details. As I listened
to him explain why he and his wife, Louise decided to begin their
ambitious development it became evident to me that this was a man
who had a dream fuelled by an intense passion for fulfilling that
dream. He is also very clearly a man who plans on doing whatever he
can to achieve his goals while at the same time helping others
around him accomplish their own goals as well.
Phil stated
convincingly that he hopes all other developers in
Valley East
are able to
sell their own lots and homes and that the Valley will remain the
fastest growing section of the region. He truly believes that
everyone can be successful and achieve their goals while providing
for the needs of the people in this community. In other words, if we
all work hard to help each other we will all have a better chance of
succeeding. He has not created Nature’s Haven Parkland Estates to
take business away from others. He has created his development so
that some people can have a wonderful place to live.
It reminds me of
the story about the farmer who had a reputation for growing
prize-winning corn. Every year he entered his corn in the county
fair and every year he walked away with the first place ribbon. One
day he was asked by a reporter to reveal his secret.
The farmer stated
that each year he would take enough seeds from his harvest so that
he could plant another crop the following spring. That way he would
always be planting the seeds from his prize-winning crop. However,
the reporter was astonished at what the farmer said next. The farmer
said, “I then give each of my neighbours enough of my seed to
plant on their farms as well. I realized a long time ago that in
order for my own corn to grow strong and healthy it was important
that the crops around me were also strong and healthy.”
In keeping with
that same philosophy, another local business, Grill Marks Bistro,
Golf & Conference Centre, is planning on working with other
businesses in the community to develop an effective way for them to
network and communicate with each other. Grill Marks is going to
create a year-round centre that will help all businesses grow
stronger together by giving them a place where they can meet each
other and also provide for the needs of their clients and customers.
Grill Marks has more information about this in another section of
this paper.
Once again, it
demonstrates the power of working together. Just consider for
example, how easy it is to tear a phone book in half when you tear
the pages one at a time. However, take a whole phone book at once
and try to tear it in half when all of the pages are together. It is
almost impossible.
And so, through
the efforts of people like Phil Landry of Nature’s Haven, the
ownership group of Grill Marks Bistro, and the Charette’s of The
Vision Paper, we can all be inspired to join together as one large
business network, looking out for each other and sincerely striving
to help each other succeed. We are much stronger when we work
together. If we try to go it alone, we are easy to destroy, just as
it is easy to tear apart a phone book, one page at a time. Sometimes
we just need a gentle reminder about how strong we can be when we
stick together.
And so, as we
move forward as a community, let’s all remember that we are in
this as partners. If we all show support for our local businesses
they will be in a better position to provide for our needs as
consumers.
Valley East
is on the verge
of some pretty exciting developments and I think we will all be
amazed at how much we can achieve – together.
Have a good week!
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“The
Tipping Point Has Been Reached” June
9, 2008
|
Malcolm
Gladwell is the author of a book called “The
Tipping Point”. He defines a “tipping point” as a
“magic moment when a trend crosses a threshold, tips, and
spreads like wildfire.” Keep this definition in mind as you
read the rest of the article.
My wife and
I moved to
Valley
East
in 1974.
We raised three sons in this town and are now watching our two
granddaughters being raised by our oldest son and his wife.
There have been many changes to
Valley
East
during
those 34 years. In fact, it has been argued for a long time
that this has been the fastest growing segment of the region.
During the
past five years in particular, we have indeed witnessed an
emerging trend as more and more families have chosen to set up
residence in
Valley
East
.
Subdivisions have been rapidly expanding with new homes being
built continuously in that time.
We have
also watched our retail sector grow a lot during the past few
years. The Hart Department Store arrived at the Hanmer Valley
Shopping Centre, ushering in a new era of development which
saw Canadian Tire, Marks Work Wearhouse and Shopper’s Drug
Mart soon set up their facilities in what is becoming the
“power centre” of the Valley. The retail establishments in
Val Caron have continued to maintain their level of activity
and local residents realize that they now have pretty much
everything they need to meet their personal and family needs.
Our social
and recreational growth has also been phenomenal. Some of this
growth is a direct result of The Hanmer Valley Shopping Centre
emerging as a “community centre” with local organizations
utilizing the indoor facility as a place for registering
soccer, hockey, baseball, ringette, swimming and many other
activities. Schools, churches and groups are using the site as
a place to hole their penny table, bake table and raffles as
they raise funds to help support their various initiatives.
Even the seniors of the community are using the shopping
centre to gather and meet on a regular basis to keep in touch
or just to enjoy walking around in climate-controlled comfort.
Personally,
even though I have lived through the trends of the past 34
years, I have never been as excited about the growth of
Valley
East
as I am
right at this moment.
There are
two big reasons for this excitement, and my understanding of
how the “tipping point” phenomena works gives me even more
reason to believe that we definitely have arrived at the
“Tipping Point” in
Valley
East
. From
this point forward we are going to experience growth in this
community the likes of which we have never seen before.
About two
months ago I met a man with a dream. Phil Landry told me about
the dream he and his wife, Louise, have had for many years. I
immediately recognized the “tipping point”. You can read
all about their dream in the article about Nature’s Haven in
the cover story of this issue of The Vision Paper as well as
on the back page. The $100 million 77 acre development in
Hanmer will not only provide all of the usual economic
benefits as well as additional housing for new residents, it
will be the starting point for a whole domino effect of new
development and expansion throughout this entire community.
Shortly
after I met with Phil Landry, I met another wonderful family
in Val Caron who also have a dream. Their dream is to turn the
“Clearview Golf Club” into a fantastic, multi-purpose
bistro, golf and conference facility, raising our community
profile even higher among a whole new market. Jim, Lynda,
Christina and Tyler, along with Dave and all of the staff at
Grill Marks are drawing people “back to the NEW Clearview”
in droves. And people are absolutely amazed at the changes
they are discovering.
The
Nature’s Haven Parkland Estates & Condominiums
development in Hanmer; the Grill Marks Bistro, Golf &
Conference Centre in Val Caron; the Hanmer Valley Shopping
Centre in Val Therese; and The Vision Paper are all part of
the “Tipping Point”. The
trend has been here for a long time. We just needed that
“magic moment”, the “tipping point” to cross the
threshold. I think we have reached that “tipping point”
and we are about to experience growth and expansion in
Valley
East
like
nothing we could have ever imagined.
Enjoy the
ride during the next few years. Good things are going to
happen and they are going to happen fast. I’ve always been
proud to tell people I live in
Valley
East
, but I
have never felt this pride more than I do now. This is
definitely “A Place To Grow”.
Have
a good week!
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“
Go
Above And Beyond What Is Expected”
June
2, 2008
|
Charles Kendall Adams was a Professor of History
and an Author who died in 1902. One of his most inspirational
messages lives on as a timeless reminder of what it takes to
be successful in whatever it is that you are doing with your
life.
"No
one ever attains very eminent success by simply doing what is
required of him; it is the amount and excellence of what is
over and above the required that determines the greatness of
ultimate distinction."
I’ve read
that message before, worded somewhat differently, but
nonetheless with the same intent. Yet with the passing of yet
“another” birthday it seems to have had more of an impact
on me than usual. Another reason why it is stirring up a
passionate response within is because in recent years it has
become evident that many people in our society are missing out
on success because they don’t understand how important it is
to go “above and beyond” what is expected of you in every
aspect of your life. This is the only way to get noticed and
it is the only way to truly make a difference.
No matter
who I speak with, everyone has goals and dreams. It doesn’t
matter if you are 10 years old or if you are 80 years old. We
all have dreams. We all have visions of what we want to
achieve and of how we would like our life to turn out. I’m
not just talking about the “big goals”, but even things as
simple as baking a cake, building a deck or painting a room.
It is often
while we are doing those “little things” that we
experience the frustration and despair of knowing that our
plans just haven’t turned out as we wanted or had hoped. You
may have felt you had done everything you possibly could to
achieve a particular goal. It may be something as simple as
trying to grow flowers in your garden, or as serious as how to
cultivate a better relationship with your child or spouse, or
something to do with your job. Whatever the case, there comes
a point when you simply feel you can’t go on any further.
The
other day someone asked me how I find the energy to do so many
things with the time I have available. They asked me what it
is that fuels the inner passion that makes me want to always
go above and beyond what is expected of me. I told the person
that a number of years ago I read an article by Jeff Keller
that taught me the importance of going the distance and doing
that little bit extra. I can never forget this message because
twice a day I am reminded about the article.
The article
is entitled “There’s A Lot More Left In The Tube”. Keller
wrote the following: “Every time I come to the end of a tube
of toothpaste, I am completely amazed that just when I think
the tube is absolutely empty, I can squeeze many more
brushings out of it. I’m sure you have all gone through the
same thing. I look at the seemingly empty tube in my hand,
then I look at the new tube in the box, and I have to decide
whether to throw away the old and open the new, or try to
squeeze a few more out of the old. Without fail, just when I
think the tube is absolutely empty, I get to squeeze another
12 or 15 more brushings out of it. So, next time you find
yourself in a situation where you feel you just can’t go on
any further, remember the "tube". It’s usually
when things haven’t been working out and you feel like
quitting, that you experience a major breakthrough. We can all
recall times when success came when we were on our last chance
or when we were doing something for the final time. It is when
you dig deep down for that one last burst of energy that you
find your goal.”
Unfortunately,
too many people I come across today quit too early - just
before they could get around that final corner to success. All
they needed to do was squeeze one more drop from the tube.
If you have
a goal; if you truly believe in yourself; and if you have the
passion, enthusiasm and commitment to go for your dream; then
keep squeezing that "inner tube of toothpaste" one
more time. It is only when you run out of the
"passion" that you will know that your "tube is
empty". Just make sure that you don’t quit too soon.
Success may be just around the corner. Just one more squeeze.
Just
remember that it doesn’t always take much to do more than
expected. Water is hot at 99 degrees Celsius, but it only
takes “one” more degree to make it boil. You may be able
to get away with doing most jobs and activities with 99
degrees of effort, but all it takes is that one “extra”
degree of effort to turn a good job into a great one! Go the
extra degree.
Have a good
day!
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“
Buy
The Steak…Life Is Precious
”
May
27, 2008
|
Even though there is so much focus in the media about
how the
Sudbury
economy is booming, I know for a fact that many people in this
area are having a difficult time making ends meet. Not
everyone is earning over $100,000 a year where they work and
regardless of what you are making, you can’t escape the
challenges that life throws at you from time to time.
This week
my thoughts are for everyone out there who has ever played the
“I wish
I could...” game. I know I find myself playing it often. I
wish I made enough money to drive a car like that. I wish I
could take exotic vacations to far off countries. I wish I
could own a bigger house. I wish I could buy something nicer
to wear.
Sometimes I
get into the “I wish...” mode and it takes a jolt to knock
me back into reality. Then I play the “I’m glad...”
game. I’m glad I have my own health. I’m glad my wife and
children are all healthy. I’m glad I can see my two
grandchildren every day.
Let’s
face it! Life is too short for regrets. We should all be
thankful every day for who we are and what we have, instead of
wishing for more or wishing that we were someone else or in
someplace else. I found a little story which clearly
demonstrates this message. Too many of us don’t realize just
how lucky we are until it’s too late.
The story
is told by a 60 year old lady.
“I walked
into the grocery store, not particularly interested in buying
groceries. I wasn’t hungry. The pain of losing Rudy, my
husband of 37 years was still too raw. And this grocery store
held so many sweet memories.
Rudy often
came with me and almost every time he’d pretend to go off
and look for something special.
I knew what
he was up to. I’d always spot him walking down the aisle
with the three yellow roses in his hands. Rudy knew I loved
yellow roses.
With a
heart filled with grief, I only wanted to buy my few items and
leave, but even grocery shopping was different since Rudy had
passed on.
Shopping
for one took time. It required a little more thought than it
had for two. Standing by the meat, I searched for the perfect
small steak and remembered how Rudy had loved his steak.
Suddenly a
woman came beside me. She was blond, slim and lovely in a soft
green pantsuit. I watched as she picked up a large pack of
T-bones, dropped them in her basket, hesitated, and then put
them back.
She turned
to go and once again reached for the pack of steaks. She saw
me watching her and she smiled, “My husband loves T-bones,
but honestly, at these prices, I don’t know.”
I swallowed
the emotion down my throat and met her pale blue eyes. “My
husband passed away eight days ago,” I told her. Glancing at
the package in her hands, I fought to control the tremble in
my voice. “Buy him the steaks. And cherish every moment you
have together.”
She shook
her head and I saw the emotion in her eyes as she placed the
package in her basket and wheeled away.
I turned
and pushed my cart across the length of the store to the dairy
products. There I stood, trying to decide which size milk I
should buy. One litre, I finally decided and moved on to the
ice cream section near the front of the store. If nothing
else, I could always fix myself an ice cream cone. I placed
the ice cream in my cart and looked down the aisle toward the
front.
I first saw
the green suit, then recognized the pretty lady coming towards
me. In her arms she carried a package. On her face was the
brightest smile I had ever seen. I could swear a soft halo
encircled her blond hair as she kept walking toward me, her
eyes holding mine. As she came closer, I saw what she held and
tears began misting in my eyes.
“These
are for you,” she said and placed three beautiful
long-stemmed yellow roses in my arms. “When you go through
the line, they will know these are paid for.” She leaned
over and placed a gently kiss on my cheek, then smiled again.
I wanted to
tell her what she’d done...what the roses meant...but still
unable to speak, I watched as she walked away as tears clouded
my vision. I looked down at the beautiful roses nestled in the
green tissue wrapping and found it almost unreal. How did she
know? Suddenly the answer seemed so clear. I wasn’t alone.
“Oh, Rudy, you haven’t forgotten me, have you?” I
whispered, with tears in my eyes. He was still with me, and
she was his angel.
Whenever
you find yourself playing the “I wish…” game, think
about this story. And the next time you have to make a
decision, buy the steak! Life is too precious.
Have a good
week!
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“
Can
We Ever Do Too Much For Our Children or Grandchildren?
”
May20,
2008
|
One
of the most difficult challenges facing parents today deals
with the whole area of how much you should do for your
children. I don’t think there are any right answers to this
parenting dilemma. If you do too much for them, they will
never learn to fend for themselves. If you do too little, they
will think you don’t love them. And what kind of example are
you providing for them when they have children themselves?
My wife and I have thoroughly enjoyed our children. We
live for them and have devoted our entire life to caring for
them and being there when they need us. Now, we are thoroughly
enjoying our grandchildren. We couldn’t imagine a life
without being directly involved with them. Our own children
have “left the nest”, but we still worry as parents and do
whatever we can to help them enjoy life to the fullest and
meet their own challenges, while at the same time facing new
challenges as “aging baby boomers”. I have spoken to a
number of parents who have looked back over the years and
listed many things that they have done and accomplished, but
who also seldom mention their children. Whenever my wife and I
recall the high points in our life, it always involves
something we have done with our children and grandchildren.
One day I was wondering whether or not we may have made
a mistake by centering our lives around our three boys and now
around our granddaughters, perhaps doing too much for and with
them. Then I came across the following story and have never
again questioned the decision my wife and I have made about
how much we’ve been involved with our children and
grandchildren.
The story is told by a young lady speaking about her
father.
“For
52 years my father got up every morning at 5:30 a.m., except
Sunday, and went to work. For 52 years he returned home at
5:30 p.m., like clockwork, for dinner at 6:00 p.m. I never
remember my father taking a “night out with the boys,” nor
do I ever recall my father drinking heavily. All he asked from
me as his daughter was to hold his hammer while he repaired
something, just so we could have some time to talk to each
other.
I never saw my father home from work ill, nor did I
ever see my father lay down to take a nap. He had no hobbies,
other than taking care of his family.
For 22 years, since I left home for college, my father
called me every Sunday at 9:00 a.m. He was always interested
in my life, how my family was doing, and I never once heard
him lament about his lot in life. The calls even came when he
and my mother were in
Australia
,
England
or
Florida
.
Nine years ago when I purchased my first house, my
father, 67 years old, spent eight hours a day for three days
in the 80-degree
Kansas
heat,
painting my house. He would not allow me to pay someone to
have it done. All he asked, was a glass of iced tea, and that
I hold a paint brush for him and talk to him. But I was too
busy. I had a law practice to run, and I could not take the
time to hold the paint brush, or talk to my father.
Five years ago, at age 71, again in the sweltering
Kansas
heat, my
father spent five hours putting together a swing set for my
daughter. Again, all he asked was that I get him a glass of
iced tea, and talk to him. But again, I had laundry to do, and
the house to clean.
Four years ago, my father drove all the way from
Denver
to
Topeka
, with an
eight foot Colorado Blue Spruce in his trunk, so that my
husband and I could have a part of
Colorado
growing
on our land. I was preparing for a trip that weekend and
couldn’t spend much time talking to Daddy.
The
morning of Sunday, January 16, 1996, my father telephoned me
as usual, this time from my sister’s home in
Florida
. We
talked about the tree he had brought me, “Fat Albert”, but
that morning he called the tree “Fat Oscar”, and he had
seemed to have forgotten some things we had discussed the
previous week. I had to get to church and I cut the
conversation short.
The call came at 4:40 p.m., that day. My father was in
the hospital in
Florida
with an
aneurysm. I got on an airplane immediately, and on the way, I
thought of all the times I had not taken the time to talk to
my father. I realized that I had no idea who he was or what
his deepest thoughts were. I vowed that when I arrived, I
would make up for the lost time, and have a nice long talk
with him and really get to know him.
I
arrived in
Florida
at 1
a.m.. My father had passed away at 9:12 p.m. This time it was
he who did not have time to talk, or time to wait for me.
In the years since his death I have learned much about
my father, and even more about myself. As a father, he never
asked me for anything but my time. Now he has all my
attention, every single day.”
So next time you feel like doing something for one of
your children, go ahead and do it. The next time you feel like
doing something for one of your grandchildren, go ahead and do
it. Never mind if others think you are doing too much for
them. They are your children and your grandchildren and you
can give them as much as you want.
Have a good week!
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“
To
All Research
Associates in the Field of Child Development and Human Relations
”
May
12, 2008
|
Mother’s
Day 2008 has come and gone. This is one day when people go out
of their way to show appreciation to mothers and grandmothers
by saying thank you with phone calls, gifts and spending time
together. It is truly one of the most special days of the year
and the attention is certainly deserved by the women upon whom
we all owe our existence. Personally,
I like to wait until after the hoopla of the day has passed
before paying tribute to the women who have the most important
job in the world.
This week I want to thank my good friend Cecile Coutu
for sending me an email with the following little story that
uses a bit of humour to demonstrate just how misunderstood and
underappreciated mothers really are. Unfortunately, people in
our society tend to “define” a person by what they do and
where they work rather than by who they are as an individual.
I admire women who have the confidence to state proudly that
they are a “mom” first and foremost without feeling as if
they must also have some other career title to go along with
their name. For it is the role of “mother” that is the
most demanding of all careers, and it is that “occupation”
that should be revered above all others.
Read the story below and see what I mean. It was told
by an unknown woman who was “just a housewife”, but I
think every mother in the world, whether you have a career
outside the home or not, will appreciate the opportunity to
use this approach at some time in the future.
One day a
woman who was renewing her driver's license was asked by the
female clerk to state her occupation.
The woman hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself.
"What
I mean is,” explained the recorder, "do you have
a job or are you just a ..?"
"Of
course I have a job," snapped the woman.
"I'm a Mom."
"We
don't list 'Mom' as an occupation, 'housewife' covers it,”
said the recorder emphatically.
The next
time she found herself in a similar situation she was in front
of a clerk at the Town Hall. The
clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and
possessed of a high sounding title like, Town Registrar.
"What is your occupation?" she probed.
The
woman wasn’t sure what made her say what followed, but for
some reason the words simply popped out. "I'm a Research
Associate in the field of Child Development and Human
Relations."
The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in midair and looked up as
though she had not heard right.
The woman
repeated the title slowly emphasizing the most significant
words. Then she stared with wonder as the clerk wrote the
title, “Research Associate in the Field of Child Development
and Human Relations” in bold, black ink on the official
questionnaire.
"Might I ask," said the clerk with new interest, "just what
you do in your field?"
Coolly, without any trace of fluster in her voice, the woman replied (note
that the words in brackets were what the woman was thinking
while she spoke to the clerk), “I have a continuing program
of research, (what mother doesn't) in the laboratory and in
the field, (normally the woman would have said indoors and
out). I'm working
for my Masters, (first the Lord and then the whole family) and
already have four credits (all daughters). Of course,
the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities, (Any
mother care to disagree?) and I often work 14 hours a day, (24
is more like it). But the job is more challenging than
most run-of-the-mill careers and the rewards are more of a satisfaction rather than just money."
There was
an increasing note of respect in the clerk's voice as she
completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered the woman
to the door.
As the
woman drove into her driveway, buoyed up by her glamorous new
career, she was greeted by her lab assistants -- ages 13, 7,
and 3. Upstairs she could hear their new
experimental model, (a 6 month old baby) in the child
development program, testing out a new vocal pattern. She felt
she had scored a beat on bureaucracy! And she had gone
on the official records as someone more distinguished and
indispensable to mankind than "just another Mom."
Motherhood! What a glorious career! Especially
when there's a title on the door.
To all grandmothers, congratulations on your fabulous
career as "Senior
Research associates in the field of Child Development and
Human Relations" And congratulations to great
grandmothers, our new "Executive Senior Research
Associates?"
Happy
Mother’s Day – Every Day!
Have a good week.
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“It’s
Hard To Be Innovative In The Land of Penguins
”
May
5, 2008
|
I
read a quote the other day by Tom Peters. He said, “I've
spent a good part of my life studying economic successes and
failures...above all, I've learned that everything takes a
back seat to innovation.”
It is hard to
argue against what Mr. Peters said. Innovation, after all,
seems to be the “ultimate goal”, the “key to survival”
in business and government today. Everyone is being encouraged
to “think outside the box” and use their creativity to
come up with new and improved ways of doing things. After all,
it’s been said that “if you always do what you’ve always
done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.”
In other words, it is ludicrous to expect different
results if you continue to do what you’ve always done in the
past.
So when businesses and government organizations have a
chance to hire new graduates fresh out of college or
university, it must be just like striking gold! These young
men and women are eager and ready to use their talents and
passions to change the world.
And yet, every time I read about innovation being the
next big “thing” when it comes to a philosophical approach
to the world of business, I am reminded of some of my own
personal experiences when I entered new chapters of my life. I
once recall being cautioned by a friend and colleague of mine
who warned me AGAINST standing out from the crowd. He advised
me that if I wanted to be successful in my career I should
hold back my enthusiasm and passion to avoid “showing up”
everyone else around me who did not share my attitude. He told
me to go with the flow, do my job, and I would get along fine
with everyone else. If
I did too good a job, my fellow workers would resent it and
they would work against me to make it impossible for me to
succeed.
I had almost forgotten that conversation until I read
about “Perry the Peacock”. The
following is a brief excerpt from “A Peacock In The Land of
The Penquins”, written by B.J. Gallagher and Warren Schmidt.
As you read it, see if you recognize anything familiar about
the story and where you work or the organizations to which you
belong.
Perry the
Peacock was in for a number of different challenges when he
left the
land
of
Learning
and went to work in the
Land
of
Penquins
.
He was used to hard work and fighting for his ideas and
competing with many different kinds of birds, but nothing in
his background had prepared him for the unique ways and
special customs of the
Land
of
Penguins
.
He wanted to do well and be successful. He was
flattered that these powerful and prestigious penguins had
recruited him into their ranks, and he wanted to please them.
He studied
the penguins’ walk, their talk, and their style. “How
strange,” he thought to himself. “They all look alike.
They’re like clones of each other”. He was intrigued and
puzzled at the same time.
And as time
went on, his troubles began…
Some of the
penguins began to grumble that his distinctive peacock voice
was too loud. You see, penguins speak in subdued, modulated
tones, and the peacock’s laughter and excited exclamations
startled their time-honoured sense of propriety.
His
feathers began to show more and more all the time, as he
worked hard and accomplished many great things. Everyone
agreed that he was quite talented and productive, and they
liked the impressive results of his work. But his flashy,
colourful style made some of the senior penguins uneasy.
Some of the
junior penguins privately speculated about how long he would
last in the
Land
of
Penguins
. They saw how unpenguinlike he was, and wondered how long
this would be tolerated by the elders.
You can
imagine where the rest of the story is heading so there is no
need to go on. I think you can also see that Perry The Peacock
likely didn’t remain in the
Land
of
Penguins
very long.
The
Land
of
Penguins
exists in far too many places today. Many businesses and
organizations may “talk about innovation and the need for
employees to be creative risk-takers”, but it quite another
thing to “walk the talk”. If you stand out from the crowd,
the crowd will quickly put you back in your place. The biggest
problem we have in society today is not a lack of innovative
ideas, but rather a general “acceptance of mediocrity”. We
know what it takes to be successful, but many of us are happy
and content right where we are, without having to put in more
effort than necessary. When a “Peacock” comes into our
midst, many people feel the need to undermine this innovative
spirit lest it makes the rest of the group look bad.
I have met a lot of young, innovative students during
the last few years. Many of them are definitely Peacocks. I
only hope they don’t get turned off when they enter the
Land
of
Penguins
.
Have a good
week.
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“Inspiration
From The Other Side of The World
”
April
28, 2008
|
People often ask me where I get the topics for my weekly
editorials and articles. I explain that there is no magic
formula or plan of action that I follow. I just go about my
life knowing that each week something will come up that moves
me in some strange and powerful way and I will know what to
write. It’s a lot like shopping for a new jacket. You may
not know exactly what you are looking for when you enter the
store, but when you see the right jacket you’ll know it was
what you were looking for.
Just for a
little bit of background about today’s editorial, let me
explain that The Vision Paper is available online by going to
the web site www.thevisionpaper.com
You can read all of the articles in many of the past issues.
Also, for the past five or six years, I have been personally
publishing a community web site called Valley East Today, at www.valleyeasttoday.ca
That web site contains a massive amount of information and
stories about the people and places of
Valley
East
. It has
become an online living history of
Valley
East
.
Therefore,
news about
Valley
East
is
travelling all over the world through the power of the
internet. As such, we have no idea who is reading our articles
and editorials. So imagine how I felt when I sat at my
computer the other morning and read the following email:
Hi Mr. Robert Kirwan
How are you this morning?
I am a young man from
Namibia
who has been reading your articles on Valley East
Today's site. I just wanted to say I appreciate what you
are doing. By writing these inspiring stories and
articles, you don't know how many lives are changed and
transformed. Currently, I personally am going through
some tough times. I am married with three children. And
since the beginning of this year I did not work since
the school where I have been serving closed last year in
December. There are times I feel like God has forsaken
me. But every time I read the bible and your articles, I
feel elevated again. I feel encouraged again to face
life's challenge. You are such an inspiring writer,
please keep up the good work and may the almighty GOD
bless you with more wisdom.
Inspired reader
Seth
|
The
Republic
of
Namibia
, a place I had never even heard of before, is a country in
southern
Africa
on the Atlantic coast. It has a population of just over 2
million and its economy consists mainly of mining and
manufacturing. Because of significant investment,
Namibia
is expected to be the world’s largest exporter of uranium by
2015. It also produces a great deal of gem-quality diamonds as
well as many other precious minerals. Despite what would seem
to be a strong economy, about half the population depends on
agriculture for its livelihood. The majority of
Namibia
’s people live in rural areas and exist on a subsistence way
of life.
Namibia
has one of the highest rates of income inequality in the world
together with a 30-40% unemployment rate.
I
realize a lot of people read my editorials, but it is so
humbling to realize that a person like Seth, living half way
around the world, in a country where there are so many
challenges being faced on a day-to-day basis, is able to
receive strength and inspiration from my words. It makes all
of my own problems seem pale in comparison.
The
internet is a powerful tool. Many people focus on the negative
aspects of the internet, but when I see what the internet can
do for people like Seth, it blows me away. I just can’t find
the words to express how that little email has inspired me
personally and is proof that each and every one of us has a
purpose and that all we have to do is live each day to the
fullest and be nice to each other.
I
really don’t know what to say to Seth, other than I wish him
and his family all the best and I thank him from the bottom of
my heart for the way he has inspired me. He may not know it,
but indirectly, HIS words of inspiration will give me the
motivation to continue to write these editorials, and so he is
also partly responsible for the positive impact these weekly
editorials may have on others around the world.
Have a good week!
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“Human
thoughts have a tendency to transform themselves into their physical
equivalent”
April
21, 2008
|
It
has been said that a person can read or hear something a
thousand times, but for some strange reason, we cannot
discover the true meaning of the words until we are ready to
discover it.
Perhaps that is why these weekly editorials are so
popular among readers of the Vision Paper. Many of the stories
and examples I use have been around for decades, and most of
you have likely seen them countless times before, but no
matter how often you have seen one of these stories, the
affect it has on you depends on what is going on in your life
at the moment you read it. The last time you read the story it
may not have had any impact on you. But this time, it may have
a profound meaning because of something that has happened to
you recently. The next time you read the story it may have a
totally different implication. I know this is true because I
often go back and read my editorials over again and each time
I read one it has a different affect on me.
So I want you to read this next sentence carefully. I
used it in the title and I am repeating it again. “Human
thoughts have a tendency to transform themselves into their
physical equivalent.” That quotation apparently comes from a
man named, Earl Nightingale. I’m not sure who Earl
Nightingale is, and I doubt if the quotation would have meant
much to me if I had read it last year. I’m also aware of
different versions of the concept. Nevertheless, a number of
things have happened in my world during the past several
months that have given a whole new meaning to those words.
The first time I saw that sentence I had to stop and
read it over again. I don’t know why, but it seemed to
illuminate me in a way I had never experienced before. Each
time I looked back at the sentence the feeling became stronger
and it seemed as if I was somehow going through a
transformation. I couldn’t quite explain what was going on,
but I knew deep down that I was no longer the same person I
was before I read that sentence.
Within a few days of reading the quotation an
opportunity came up for me to do something I have always
dreamed of doing for my community. Most of you know from past
editorials that I am a firm believer that everything happens
for a reason and the meaning behind what takes place in your
life is serving your own evolution as a person. So I didn’t
find it unusual one morning a couple of weeks ago to be
sitting down talking to a man I had never met before about a
project he was about to begin.
The result of that brief conversation is that many of
the “thoughts” that have been with me for years are about
to “transform themselves into their physical equivalent”,
just as it says in the quotation.
What’s even more astounding is that everything I am
currently doing in my life that seemed to be disconnected is
actually coming together in a way that will make it much
easier for me to “transform those thoughts into their
physical equivalent”. It’s almost as if by reading that
quotation I was able to see the relevance of the opportunity
this man was providing me. I have never considered myself to
be a person lacking in self-confidence, but my state of
confidence has risen to a new level since reading that
quotation and I have no doubt at all that this new venture
will succeed and in so doing make all of my other activities
more fulfilling at the same time.
And so as I sat down at my computer to write my
editorial for this week, I realized that as human beings we
all have such a tremendous responsibility to each other. You
must wake up each day with the understanding that your actions
will be absorbed by the people around you and they will
experience the fullness of life to the level of your
influence. Never take this level of influence for granted.
Your thoughts will “transform themselves into their physical
equivalent”, so make sure that your thoughts are going to
result in a positive transformation for whomever it is that
you exert your influence.
Thomas Edison once said, “Many of life’s failures
are men and women who did not realize how close they were to
success when they gave up”. I hope this week I can somehow
give you the courage and motivation to hold on just a bit
longer to those dreams you once had. Look for the
opportunities to “transform your thoughts into their
physical equivalent”. The conditions will one day be perfect
and everything will make sense. You will never know from where
the motivation or illumination will come, but it will
eventually come as long as you hold on to those dreams.
Don’t give up too soon. Success may be just a day away.
Have a good week!
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“Let’s Give Our
Young Students An
Opportunity
This Summer”
April
14, 2008
|
We’ve
been listening to warnings for many years that our young
people are going to face fierce competition for the best jobs
in the future. The main competition is going to come from
immigrants from foreign countries who come to
Canada
armed
with an excellent education and a work ethic that is making
business owners drool with anticipation. It’s been said that
in
Japan
alone,
the TOP 25% of their graduating students outnumber ALL of the
students graduating in
North
America
every
year. And many of those Japanese graduates dream of coming to
Canada
to start
a career.
Even if our government creates immigration policies
that protect our young people from some of this competition,
we can’t guard Canadian businesses from the global
marketplace where the strongest companies will prevail.
Canadian companies must be prepared to adapt through
innovation and creativity in order to withstand the
competition from abroad. Consider the following story as a
simple example of what we are up against.
“A
Japanese company and a Canadian company had a boat race. The
Japanese company won by a kilometre. The Canadians hired
analysts to figure out what went wrong. They reported that the
Japanese had one person managing and seven rowing, while the
Canadians had seven managing and only one rowing. The Canadian
company immediately restructured its team. Now they had one
senior manager, six management consultants and one rower. In
the rematch the Japanese won by two kilometres. The Canadian
company fired the rower.”
University and college students will soon be finished
school for the summer and will be out looking for work. Local
businesses should do whatever they can to find a spot for
these young, energetic “rowers of our community”. This is
the perfect time to begin that project you have always wanted
to do but couldn’t find the time or the manpower. Hire a
couple of students for a few months and see what happens. Who
knows, this may be the shot in the arm that your business
needs to generate more customers. Our young people have a lot
of energy and some good ideas. Give them a chance. Here is
another story for you.
Consider the story of the American, the Scot and the
Canadian who were killed in a car accident. They arrived at
the gates of heaven, where a flustered Saint Peter explained
that there had been a mistake. “Give me $500 each,” he
said, “and I’ll return you to earth as if the whole thing
never happened.”
“Done!” said the American. Instantly he found
himself standing unhurt near the scene of the accident.
“Where are the others?” a medic asked.
“Last I knew,” said the American, “the Scot was
haggling price, and the Canadian was arguing that his
government should pay.”
We should all follow the leadership of the American in
this story. Never mind worrying how much you are going to pay
the students. And don’t wait for government grants to
subsidize the wages you will have to pay. The American saw an
opportunity and immediately seized upon it. The availability
of eager, well-trained, energetic young students who are
willing to do any type of work for the summer, is an
opportunity which business owners cannot let slip away. These
young people do not demand much in wages and can add a great
deal of creativity and ingenuity to any local operation. In
fact, many are taking courses at school which may end up being
very helpful in establishing strategic planning for your
business. Furthermore, it is a chance to pass on some of your
valuable experience to students. This will help them greatly
in getting through their future courses and graduating as
contributing members of society.
I leave you with a final story about a young man who
applied to a finance agency for a job, but he had no
experience. He was so persistent that the manager gave him a
tough account with the promise that if he collected, he’d
get the job. The manager thought that he was rid of the person
for good.
Two hours later, the young man came back with the whole
amount paid in full. “Amazing!” the manager said. “How
did you do it?”
“Easy.” the young man replied. “I told him if he
didn’t pay up, I’d tell all his other creditors that he
already paid us.”
So give the kids a chance this summer. Let them
“earn” experience in your business and give them the tough
assignments. I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised at the
results. They will need all the help they can to develop the
skills necessary to help them compete for jobs in a very
competitive global economy. You can help!
Have a good week!
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“
Go Out And Make It Happen”
April
7, 2008
|
The root of most of the problems in society today is
that many people are unwilling to engage in the hard, honest
work that is necessary in order to achieve personal success.
We all want the easy way out! We want to ‘win’ the
big lottery so that we can retire and live in the lap of
luxury! And when things don’t go exactly the way we planned,
instead of increasing our work effort, we seek others to blame
for our misfortune. Furthermore, instead of being happy for
others who are successful, many of us tend to find fault with
them or accuse them of using less than honest methods to
achieve their rewards. In other words, we all want to be
successful ourselves, but we are often jealous of others who
are successful.
The other day I read a little story in one of my
emails about a young man in high school who obviously has a
very bright future thanks to his focus on three letters, M.I.H.
This kid has a passion for excellence in everything he does,
particularly in his favourite sport, wrestling. Last year he
had what most considered an amazing wrestling season and ended
up coming in second place in the provincial championships.
The day after the finals, he
was back in the same old gym working out in the same old
sweats with one small change. He had placed white tape on each
of his three middle fingers, and on each piece of tape was a
letter. M.I.H. His friends, family, and teammates all
repeatedly asked about the letters, but he refused to divulge
their meaning.
He kept the letters on his fingers all year, and he
trained harder than ever, until he again found himself at the
provincial championship tournament one year later. This time
the outcome was slightly different and not a surprise to
anyone who had witnessed his daily determination in the gym;
he was crowned provincial champion.
Finally, he was able to share with everyone that while
they cheered his second place finish the year before, he vowed
to himself to get better – to be the best. Displaying vision
beyond his years, he developed his clear goal, designed a plan
to achieve it, and created a tool to provide focus. He
knew that if he really wanted to be the best, it was up to
him. He was determined to Make
It Happen. The letters M.I.H. became his inspiration. Make It Happen!
We all have to face a basic fact of life and the sooner
we realize it the better. Success is not going to fall in your
lap. You have to work for it. Sure, we will come across the
odd person who was fortunate enough to come into success by
chance, but for the vast majority of people in this world,
nothing comes easy. The sooner in life we learn this lesson,
the better. It is only through hard, consistent effort that we
will reap our just rewards. And only through hard, consistent
effort will we appreciate, and cherish those rewards.
Perhaps we all need to take a field trip to a farmyard
and spend some time watching the lowly hen go about her daily
business. It was once described in a book I read that “hard
work means nothing to a hen”. Regardless of the price of
eggs, she keeps on digging worms and laying eggs.
If the ground is hard, she scratches harder.
If it is dry, she digs deeper.
If it’s wet, she digs where it is dry.
If she strikes a rock, she digs around it.
If she gets a few more hours of daylight in the
barnyard, she digs a few more hours.
Have you ever seen a pessimistic hen?
Have you ever seen a hen cackle in disgust at the
prospect of her job?
Did you ever hear one cluck because the work was hard,
the conditions were poor, and some of her eggs were taken from
her before they hatched?
Of course not!
Hens save their breath for digging. They save their
cackles for the eggs that are laid.
So next time you find yourself wishing that things
would begin going better in your life, think about the hen in
the barnyard and start scratching. Think about the young high
school student and the initials, M.I.H. Make It Happen! Go
after your dreams! Don’t wait for them to come to you! And
for goodness sake, be persistent in your efforts and never
give up. Only then will those dreams come true.
Have a good week!
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“The Importance Of Finding The Right Mentors In Your Life
”
March
31, 2008
|
I
have had the opportunity to interview some very interesting
people from a number of different career fields recently. I am
the host of a radio show on CKLU 96.7 FM that is broadcast
from Laurentian University every Monday night beginning at
6 p.m.
It is a live talk show that is done in a “Larry King
Live” format where I get to take part in a very relaxed and
informal conversation with a special guest each week. We talk
about a wide variety of topics that revolve around education
and the different careers they have been in, all the while
trying to provide young listeners with some good advice and
food for thought.
The show is called “Inside Education” and has been
on the air since the beginning of January. Guests have
included Brandon Dougan, a teacher at
Confederation
Secondary
School
; Dr.
Nancy Rebellato, a Doctor of Naturopathic Medicine; Ted
Conroy, a noted trial lawyer from Sudbury; Gilles Lebeau,
Vice-President of Mansour Mining; Mike Gribbons, President of
Synergy Controls Corporation; Kim Donaldson of Cambrian
College; and Derek Newman, Youth Program Coordinator of the
Sudbury Action Centre For Youth. The show is booked with
different guests right up until the end of June.
Even though
these people all come from a wide variety of situations what
has stood out the most to me is that they all give a great
deal of credit for their success to the “mentors” who have
provided them with guidance and assistance in their education
and in the development of their own particular career skills.
If there is one message that has come forth in virtually all
interviews, it is that no matter what you choose to do with
your life, YOU CANNOT DO IT ALONE! You MUST find someone who
will take you under their wing and pass on knowledge and
wisdom that you can incorporate into your own life. You MUST
do what you can to find good mentors who will act as your
“education coaches” and your “career coaches” and who
can give you the confidence and ability to make your own way
through life.
In
order to help you understand the importance of this message,
consider the following fishing story:
One day a fisherman was on his way home when he came
upon a man sitting by the side of the road with his family.
The man explained that he had no money to buy food and that
his family was hungry. He asked the fisherman if he had any
fish to give him so that he could feed his family.
The
fisherman reached into his sack and gave the man a few of the
fish that he had caught that afternoon. The man was grateful
for the food. He then lit a fire and fed his family a meal of
freshly caught fish.
The
next afternoon a different fisherman was on his way home when
he came upon the same family sitting by the side of the road.
The man once again explained that he had no money to buy food
and that his family was hungry. He then asked the second
fisherman if he had any fish to give him so that he could feed
his family.
The
second fisherman reached into his sack and gave the man a few
of the fish he had caught that afternoon.
Instead
of leaving, however, while the man's wife was preparing and
cooking the fish for dinner, the second fisherman took the man
to the nearby stream that was running by the side of the road.
The second fisherman then showed the man how to break off a
branch to turn it into a fishing pole. The fisherman then gave
the man a piece of fishing line and a hook. He showed the man
how to attach a berry to the hook and then showed the man how
to hold the fishing pole in the water with the hook and berry
floating on the surface. The second fisherman stayed with the
man until they caught a few fish from the stream. Once the
second fisherman was satisfied that the man was able to catch
fish on his own, the second fisherman continued on his way
down the road, satisfied that the man and his family would
never again be hungry.
The
first fisherman provided the man with the means of satisfying
the immediate hunger of the man and his family. However, the
next day the man and his family were hungry again.
The
second fisherman not only satisfied the immediate hunger of
the man and his family, he then showed the man how to catch
his own fish and left the man with suitable knowledge and
skills to make sure that he would never again go hungry. In
fact, the man now had the ability to catch fish for sale to
make money to purchase other things for his family. The second
fisherman gave the man hope and the ability to make a good
life for himself. That is what a "Personal Mentor"
does.
A
"Personal Mentor" recognizes the need to solve
immediate problems, but also realizes that it is even more
important to develop skills which will ensure that those
problems never again present the same challenges they did in
the first place.
I am
enjoying my new experience as a radio show host. But moreover,
I am pleasantly surprised to listen to so many guests confirm
my own belief in the “Mentoring Philosophy of Life”.
Have a good
week
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“Life
Is Not About What You Have, But What You Do With It…”
March
24, 2008
|
Most
of us are doing quite well in this life. Admittedly, we all
have moments when we seem to be too busy to get everything
done during the day or there just doesn’t seem to be enough
money to go around. There are also times when other people,
often strangers, ask us for help, and while we would like to
help them, we just can’t find the time or the money to
comply. We’re too busy thinking about ourselves.
This week I came across an old story that I want to
share a story with you about a lady named Ruth who found out
that the way to true happiness and satisfaction is not about
how much you have, but what you do with it.
Ruth went to her mail box one day and found that there
was only one letter. She picked it up and looked at it before
opening. There was no stamp and no postmark. Only her name and
address. She read the letter.
Dear
Ruth:
I’m
going to be in your neighbourhood Saturday afternoon and I
would like to visit.
Love
always
Jesus
Her hands were shaking as she placed the letter on the
table.
“Why
would the Lord want to visit me? I’m nobody special. I
don’t have anything to offer.” With that thought Ruth
remembered her empty kitchen cabinets.
“Oh, my goodness, I really don’t have anything to
offer. I’ll have to run down to the store and buy something
for dinner.”
Ruth
was a widow who lived by herself and barely had enough money
from her pension to get by. She hurried down to the grocery
store and purchased a loaf of French Bread, some sliced cold
cuts and a carton of milk, leaving her with less than fifty
cents until Monday.
Nonetheless, she felt good as she headed home, her
meager offerings tucked under her arm.
“Hey lady! Can you help us, lady?”
Ruth had been so absorbed in her dinner plans; she hadn’t
even noticed two figures huddled in the alleyway. A man and a
woman, both of them dressed in little more than rags.
“Look lady, I ain’t got a job, ya know, and my wife
and I have been living out here on the street, and, well, now
it’s getting cold and we’re getting kinda hungry and,
well, if you could help us, lady, we’d really appreciate
it.”
Ruth looked at them both. They were dirty; they smelled
bad and frankly, she was certain that they could get some kind
of work if they really wanted to.
“Sir,
I’d like to help you, but I’m a poor woman myself. All I
have is a few cold cuts and some bread, and I’m having an
important guest for dinner tonight and I was planning on
serving that to Him.”
“Yeah, well, okay lady. I understand. Thanks
anyway.”
The man put his arm around the woman’s shoulders,
turned and headed back into the alley. As she watched them
leave, Ruth felt a familiar twinge in her heart. “Sir,
wait!”
The couple stopped and turned as she ran down the alley
after them. “Look, why don’t you take this food. I’ll
figure out something else to serve my guest.”
She handed the man her grocery bag. “Thank you lady.
Thank you very much!”
“Yes, thank you!” It was the man’s wife, and Ruth
could see now that she was shivering.
“You know, I’ve got another coat at home. Here, why
don’t you take this one.” Ruth unbuttoned her jacket and
slipped it over the woman’s shoulders. Then smiling, she
turned and walked back to the street...without her coat and
nothing to serve her guest.
“Thank you lady! Thank you very much!”
Ruth was chilled by the time she reached her front
door, and worried too. The Lord was coming to visit and she
didn’t have anything to offer Him. She fumbled through her
purse for the door key. But as she did, she noticed another
letter in her mailbox.
“That’s odd. The mailman doesn’t usually come on
Saturday.” She took the envelope out of the box and opened
it.
Dear
Ruth:
It
was so good to see you again.
Thank
you for the lovely meal.
And
thank you, too, for the beautiful coat.
Love
always,
Jesus
The air was still cold, but even without her coat, Ruth
no longer noticed.
As you go about your normal routines this week, pay
attention to the people in this world who really need your
compassion and understanding. The next person who asks you for
help may be that important guest you were expecting all along.
Have a good week!
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“What
Will You Be Saying Three Years From Now?”
March
17, 2008
|
During the early years of my adult life I had a tendency to
examine new interests and goals of mine from the point of view
of how long it would take and how much effort was going to be
required. Many of the things I wanted to do were abandoned
because I felt it would take too long to get them done. I
often convinced myself that because of my responsibilities at
work and at home I just didn’t have time to pursue many new
dreams.
A defining
moment in my life occurred when I was “thinking” about
getting my Masters Degree back in the early 1980’s, and it
changed my entire philosophy of life.
Central
Michigan
University
announced that weekend courses would be offered specifically
for teachers seeking their master’s degree. To
earn credit for a single course required spending three
weekends in class over a period of five weeks with assignments
done in between each weekend session. The classes were offered
in
Sudbury
and
North Bay
. It would take ten courses and almost three years to complete
the program. I had always wanted to pursue my Master’s
degree but since I was in my mid-thirties I wasn’t sure if
it was worth the time and effort.
While I was
deciding whether or not to take advantage of this opportunity,
my wife asked, “If you don’t start taking these courses
today, what will you be saying three years from now?” That
question hit me like a ton of bricks. I realized that in three
years I could either be saying “I have my Master’s
Degree.” Or “I wish I had started my courses three years
ago because now I would have my degree.” The next day I
enrolled in the program and ended up with my degree two and a
half years later.
Ever since
then, whenever I am faced with a decision about whether or not
to begin working towards something worthwhile that will take a
lot of time and effort, I ask myself that same question. “If
I don’t do this, what will I be saying three years from
now?”
A few weeks
ago my wife informed me that she had always wanted to get into
“pet therapy” on a volunteer basis. This involves bringing
a highly trained dog around on visits with seniors and
children who are disadvantaged, ill or just in need of
company. Apparently this is very popular in some parts of
Canada
and the
United States
. You visit with a small group or with individuals and they
get to talk to you, pet the dog and generally feel a little
bit better for the time spent in your company. Dogs have a
tremendous therapeutic affect on seniors and children and have
been found to greatly reduce anxiety and stress.
It
takes a long time to train a dog to be a good therapeutic pet,
and even at that, there is no guarantee that the dog will be
suited for this type of work. This was apparently something
that my wife has thought about for a long time, but she had
put her own dreams on hold while devoting her entire life to
fulfilling her family responsibilities. Now that all of our
children are on their own, she has time for herself, but she
finds herself at an age when most people are looking at
slowing down and taking it easy, not considering getting into
a new venture that may take years to develop.
Last week
the opportunity came up to buy a wonderful new puppy that is a
good breed for “pet therapy”.
The last thing I wanted to do was get another dog, but
once again the question popped up in my mind. “If we don’t
buy that puppy and start training it for volunteer work in pet
therapy, what will we be saying three years from now? Will we
be saying, ‘ It is so nice to be able to brighten up the
lives of hundreds of seniors and children with our three year
old therapy dog’, or will we be saying, ‘We wish we would
have bought the pup when we had the chance.’?”
By the time
you read this editorial we will have had our new puppy,
Cooper, for almost a week.
How many
times during your own life have you wanted to do something but
put the idea on hold, simply because it seemed as if it would
take too much effort and time to accomplish your ultimate
goal. Think of all the books you could have read if you had
read just one chapter per day. Think of all the letters you
could have written to family and friends if you had only
written one letter a week.
Always keep
in mind that the sun will rise and fall 365 days a year. What
you choose to do in between sunset and sunrise will determine
many things in your life. Time will go on regardless and it
waits on nobody.
If there is
something that you have always wanted to do, forget about how
old you are; forget about how long it will take; just ask
yourself, “If I don’t start today, what will I be saying
three years from now?”
Have a good
week!
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“You
Do Make A Difference To The People In Your Life”
March
10, 2008
|
Over
the course of my life I have learned that there is no person
born on this earth who doesn’t make a difference in the
lives of others they touch. Everyone is important, and
everyone has the ability to make a tremendous impact on each
and every person they meet. More often than not, we have no
idea how much a simple gesture or kind word means to another
person. Consider the following story I came across the other
day, and send a copy of it to someone who means a lot to you.
“A teacher in
New York
decided
to honour each of her senior students by telling them the
difference they each made. Using a process developed by Helice
Bridges of
Del Mar
,
California
, she
called each student to the front of the class, one at a time.
First she told them how the student made a difference to her
and the class. Then she presented each of them with a blue
ribbon imprinted with white letters which read, “Who I Am
Makes A Difference”.
Afterwards the teacher decided to do a class project to
see what kind of impact recognition would have on a community.
She gave each of the students three more ribbons and
instructed them to go out and spread this acknowledgment
ceremony. Then they were to follow up on the results, see who
honoured whom and report back to the class in about a week.
One of the boys in the class went to a junior executive
in a nearby company and honoured him for helping with his
career planning. He gave him a blue ribbon and put it on his
shirt. Then he gave him two extra ribbons, and said,
“We’re doing a class project on recognition, and we’d
like you to go out, find somebody to honour, give them a blue
ribbon, then give them the extra ribbon so they can
acknowledge a third person to keep this acknowledgement
ceremony going. Then please report back to me and tell me what
happened.”
Later that day the junior executive went in to see his
boss, who was well-known as being kind of a grouchy fellow. He
sat his boss down and he told him that he deeply admired him
for being a creative genius. The boss seemed very surprised.
The junior executive asked him if he would accept the gift of
the ribbon and would he give him permission to put it on him.
His surprised boss said, “Well, sure.” The junior
executive took the blue ribbon and placed it right on his
boss’s jacket above his heart. As he gave him the last extra
ribbon, he said,
“Would you do me a favour? Would you take this extra
ribbon and pass it on by honouring somebody else? The young
boy who first gave me the ribbons is doing a project in school
and we want to keep this recognition ceremony going and find
out how it affects people.”
That night the boss came home to his 14-year old son
and sat him down. He said, “The most incredible thing
happened to me today. I was in my office and one of the junior
executives came and told me he admired me and gave me a blue
ribbon for being a creative genius. Imagine. He thinks I’m a
creative genius. Then he put this blue ribbon that says ‘Who
I Am Makes A Difference’ on my jacket above my heart. He
gave me an extra ribbon and asked me to find somebody else to
honour. As I was driving home tonight, I started thinking
about whom I would honour with this ribbon and I thought about
you. I want to honour you. My days are really hectic and when
I come home I don’t pay a lot of attention to you. Sometimes
I scream at you for not getting good enough grades in school
and for your bedroom being a mess, but somehow tonight, I just
wanted to sit here and, well, just let you know that you do
make a difference to me. Besides your mother, you are the most
important person in my life. You’re a great kid and I love
you!”
The startled boy started to sob and sob, and he
couldn’t stop crying. His whole body shook. He looked up at
his father and said through his tears, “I was planning on
committing suicide, Dad, because I didn’t think you loved
me. Now I don’t need to.”
There are many people in your life who mean a lot to
you. Let them know how much you care. You never know what kind
of difference a little encouragement or recognition can make
to a person. Give out your own blue ribbons; give out your
smile; give a compliment to a person who has helped you in any
way; let them know that in some small way, they make a
difference to you. And always remember that there are many
people in this world who think you are special and mean a lot
to them as well. They may not always tell you so, but it is
more true than you can imagine. You do make a difference!
Have a good week! |
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“You Have No Idea How Powerful Your Words and Gestures Can
Be…Use Them Wisely"
March
3, 2008
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What a world we are living in today!
It is
possible to communicate to hundreds and thousands of people
all over the world in an instant through email. We are
constantly connecting to people all day long by cell phones,
land lines, emails and through the internet with newsgroups
and Facebook. You can pick up your phone and talk to people
thousands of miles away just as if they were in the next room.
We often find ourselves running from one meeting to another,
or one organization to another, or from one activity to
another, with never enough time to really sit back and truly
enjoy the significance of what we are doing. People come into
our lives one day and they are gone the next. We meet so many
different people during the course of the year or even during
the course of a busy day.
And yet, despite all of this involvement with other
people, we are also living during a time when many of us feel
disconnected and lonely. We can live for years beside a next
door neighbour without ever speaking to them. We can have
family members in the same town and not have time to visit
them or call them. We have so many casual acquaintances and we
are around so many people, but many of us still feel as if we
are on our own, alone to fend for ourselves in a hostile
environment where very few people really care about us or what
happens to us, especially when we are down on our luck and
things are not going well. They are all too worried about
themselves and their own problems to be concerned about ours.
Fortunately, even in “down times” there is often
that one person, sometimes a complete stranger you have never
met, who comes along and does just the right thing to pick you
up and restore your faith in mankind. For some, it is the
slightest gesture of good will that is enough to make all the
difference in the world.
To
illustrate this point more vividly, consider the classic story
I came across recently about a high school student named Mark,
who was walking home from school one day when he noticed that
a boy ahead of him had tripped and dropped all of the books he
was carrying, along with two sweaters, a baseball bat, a glove
and a small tape recorder. Mark knelt down and helped the boy
pick up the scattered articles. They were walking in the same
direction, so he helped the boy carry some of the items.
As they
walked, Mark discovered the boy’s name was Bill and that he
loved video games, baseball and history. Mark also learned
Bill was having a lot of trouble with his other subjects and
that he had just recently broken up with his girlfriend.
When they
arrived at Bill’s home, Mark was invited inside for a cold
soft drink and to watch a bit of television. The two boys
spent a couple of hours with a few laughs and some small talk,
and then Mark went home.
They
continued to see each other around school the odd time during
the next few years and had lunch together once or twice, but
that was the extent of their relationship. Finally, three
weeks before they were both to graduate from high school, Bill
asked Mark if they could talk.
Bill
reminded Mark of the day several years ago when they had first
met. “Did you ever wonder why I was carrying so many things
home that day?” Bill asked. “You see, I cleaned out my
locker because I didn’t want to leave a mess for anyone
else. I had stored away some of my mother’s sleeping pills
and I was going home to commit suicide. But after we spent
some time together talking and laughing, I realized that if I
had killed myself, I would have missed that time and so many
others that might follow. So you see, Mark, when you picked up
those books that day, you did a lot more. You saved my
life.”
The next
time you have a chance to say something positive or
encouraging to another human being, or to make the slightest
gesture to show that you care, do so! If you see someone who
looks discouraged or down, stop and talk to that person. Let
the person know that there is someone who cares, even if the
two of you have never met. Don’t let those opportunities get
away from you.
Your words
and gestures have a tremendous amount of power. Use them
wisely. You really never know just how much they can mean to
someone else.
Have a good week!
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“
Battle
Wounds From A War of Words Take A Long Time To Heal”
February
25, 2008
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I
have often thought about pursuing a career as a professional
mediator. Admittedly, I do not have any formal education or
certification which would qualify me for this line of work,
but during my career as a classroom teacher and in my role as
a father of three boys, I have certainly had enough experience
in mediating disputes and conflict management.
In most of
the disputes to which I have been witness, whether directly
involved or as a bystander, inevitably the parties end up
engaging in an exchange of unnecessary and unkind comments
that are clearly intended to cause anger or injury to their
adversary. Those comments usually result in counterattacks
that are thrown back and forth until one side is victorious or
a compromise is reached.
The truth
is, we are all flawed human
beings. That means at times we make a personal comment, or
react to a situation in anger, only to wish we could take back
our words or say what we really wanted to say in a different
manner. Human beings are, by nature, confrontational animals.
We like to get in the last word! We are quick to strike back
with a negative comment when we are angry or when we are
insulted. We don’t like to sit back and take criticism. Many
times, our verbal attacks make us feel good for the moment,
but then we feel a sense of remorse and regret afterwards when
we realize that what we actually said may have inflicted great
pain on those around us – most often to someone we love
dearly.
Whenever I
find myself forced to step in and help two “warring
parties” resolve a conflict that has escalated into name
calling and insults, I have found that the quickest way to
settle things down is to interrupt the assault and ask one of
the people involved what they expected to accomplish by making
their negative remark. I try to get them to examine whether
their comments made things better or worse. This period of
calm reflection is often enough to begin the process of
resolving the conflict. Once people focus on what caused the
conflict in the first place and they clearly state what they
hope to accomplish once they get beyond their dispute, they
are in a better position to begin the process towards a
positive outcome.
The use of
words as weapons is not something that is common only among
children. Indeed, it is the weapon of choice for many adults,
and the battle wounds in a war of words are often injuries
that never heal.
Many years
ago I discovered a little story that best explains the damage
that can be done by words. It is a story I have told countless
times to students in my classes and it is indeed one of my
favourites. The next time you find yourself mediating a
dispute between your children, or even your adult friends,
acquaintances or co-workers, ask them to take a break for a
few minutes. Ask each of them what they expected to accomplish
by their negative remarks. And then tell them the following
story.
"There once was a little boy who had a bad temper.
His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every
time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back
of the fence. The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into
the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control
his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually
dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper
than to drive those nails into the fence.
Finally,
the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He
told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy
now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold
his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able
to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father
took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said,
"You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the
fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things
in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a
knife in a man and draw it out. It won’t matter how many
times you say I’m sorry, the wound is still there. A verbal
wound is as bad as a physical one."
So the next
time you find that you are about to lose your temper or you
want to make a negative remark to someone with whom you are in
conflict, remember the lesson that the young boy
learned. "It won’t matter how many times you say
I’m sorry, the wound is still there. A verbal wound is as
bad as a physical one."
Wounds inflicted during a war of words take a long time to heal,
especially if you love the people you hurt.
Have a
good week!
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“The
Root Cause Of Most Problems In The World Today Is Stress”
February
18, 2008
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Stress
management is a very important part of my life. Over the years
I have been involved in many different activities, often at
the same time. If I had not developed a strategy for coping
with stress I never would have survived this long.
In my current capacity as an Independent
Education and Career Development Advisor, I am seeing
first-hand that stress is the root cause of many learning
problems plaguing our young people today. It is also the root
cause of many health problems, both mental and physical, among
adults, especially parents.
Some time ago I attended a seminar about Stress
Management. I forget who the lecturer was at the time, but I
do remember the lesson he taught. It was the best explanation
I ever heard about stress and how it works. You may want to
try this experiment at home.
The lecturer gave everyone a glass of water and
asked us all if we could lift it without any difficulty. It
was an 8 oz glass of water in a plastic container, so
obviously we all told him that it was very light and we would
have no problem lifting the glass.
He then told us to pick up the cup with our right
hand and hold it up in the air with our right arm stretched
out straight.
While we were doing this, the lecturer explained,
"The absolute weight of the cup doesn't matter. You
can all hold it with ease right now. What does matter is how
long you try to hold it. If you hold it for a minute, that's
not a problem. If you hold it for an hour, you'll have an ache
in your right arm. If you hold it for several hours, you'll
have to call an ambulance. In each case it's the same weight,
but the longer you hold it, the heavier it becomes."
As the participants in the room began to moan and
grown under the strain of holding the cup at arm’s length,
he continued, "And that's the way it is with stress. If
we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the
burdens become increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry
on. With the glass of water, you have to put it down for a
while and rest before holding it again. When we're
refreshed, the glass feels lighter again and it is easy to
hold. The same is true with the things that cause stress in
our life.”
It didn’t take long for most of us to
eventually put the cup down and begin rubbing our arm to get
the circulation going again. The point was well taken.
Ever since that day whenever I find that a
problem or situation is beginning to get to me, I think about
the cup of water. I examine the problem and realize that while
it may seem like a simple matter, the longer I let it eat away
at me, the worse the situation will become and eventually it
may get the better of me.
And so, I have developed several effective ways of
“putting my burden down for a while and resting” so that
when I face the matter again, I will be refreshed and it
won’t seem like such a big deal. Everyone can find their own
ways of relaxing. In my case, I find that exercising for a
couple of hours a day in a little fitness room we’ve created
in our basement helps a lot. I also like to take a break every
day to read for an hour or so. Going for a walk around the
subdivision with my wife works wonders for my mind. This year
I find spending an hour or so shoveling the driveway is great
for reducing stress and I’ve certainly had a lot of
opportunity for this activity.
Regardless of your age or current situation, try
to remember to put your problems away for a while every day.
They won’t go away. They’ll just get “heavier” unless
you put them down for a while and get refreshed.
Just remember the cup of water. You can pick up
that same cup over and over again without any difficulty as
long as you put it down to rest every so often. If you try to
hold the cup continuously without moving or resting,
eventually it will become so heavy that you will no longer be
able to carry it.
And a special final message for parents – your
children are also under a great deal of stress today. Help
them develop positive stress management strategies or you will
run into serious problems as they grow older.
Have a good week!
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“Why
Are You Waiting? Pick Up The Phone And Call”
February
11, 2008
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Thursday,
February 14 is Valentine’s Day. Millions of cards, boxes of
chocolates and flowers will exchange hands as a sign of love
and affection. Friday, February 15 is the day after
Valentine’s Day and everything will return to normal.
Many people will even spend time making mental notes
about the people who FORGOT to send them a message of love the
day before.
Author
Stephen Levine once asked the question, “If you had an hour
to live and could spend that hour making phone calls, who
would you call, what would you say, and WHY ARE YOU
WAITING?”
“I Like Not Only To Be Loved, But To Be Told That I Am Loved - The
Realm of Silence Is Large Enough Beyond The Grave.” Those
words, spoken by George Elliot, ring out loud and true,
not only on Valentine’s Day, but throughout the entire year.
To answer
Stephen Levine, who knows what we are waiting for? Do we think
we will live forever and that someday we will get around to
telling or showing the people about whom we care just how much
we love them? How often have we attended a funeral and wished
that we had made that phone call or personal visit that we
kept pushing aside until it was too late?
We all know that there are many people who love and
care for us. We also know that we love and care for many
people. So why the big fuss about sending cards, letters and
gifts to those people on Valentine’s Day? BECAUSE WE ARE
HUMAN BEINGS AND WITHOUT LOVE WE WILL PERISH – THAT’S WHY!
Many of you may have heard of a man named Leo Buscaglia.
He was the professor at the
University
of
Southern
California
who
started a “love” course. Within weeks it was filled to
capacity as students enrolled to find out more about this
basic need of mankind. He quickly became famous through
lectures and books about love as he expressed in words and
feelings what living is really about.
To Buscaglia, love is about expression. To learn how to
love you must LIVE LOVE. One
of his students once stated “I find love much like a mirror.
When I love another, he becomes my mirror and I become his,
and in reflecting in each other’s love we see infinity.”
Buscaglia always
held the belief that one of the greatest miracles of life is
that when you share your love with others, you don’t lose
any of it. For example, you could teach a person everything
you know and still know everything you know. You don’t lose
this knowledge; you are merely sharing that knowledge.
Therefore, in the same way, it is possible for you to love
many people and demonstrate those feelings and still have all
the love energy you ever had.
And so we find ourselves approaching another
Valentine’s Day. School children are busy preparing
Valentine cards for their classmates. Husbands and wives are
busy purchasing that perfect card or gift. Restaurants get
ready for one of their busiest days of the year. All so that
we can express our love to others and receive expressions of
love in return.
All of this may seem a bit artificial. So do your self
a favour this Valentine’s Day or even during the days after
Valentine’s Day. Take time from your busy and complicated
life to express your love. Pick up the phone and call that
person you haven’t spoken to for a while. Send a little note
to a friend telling him or her how much you care. Make
every day Valentine’s Day. You may even want to make a list
of people you want to call. Even if you only contact one
person a week, in a whole year that means you will have spoken
to 52 different people who may never know just how much you
care.
Remember, people like to be told they are loved, and
the more you share your love, the more you will feel love
yourself.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
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“Why
You Do
What You Do
Defines Who You Are”
February
5, 2008
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A
couple of things happened recently that made me think about my
personal identity and purpose in life.
I was talking to an acquaintance in preparing for an
article for The Vision when we began discussing how I’ve
become more involved in education once again and she said,
“Well of course. It’s not a big surprise. That’s who you
are. You’re returning to your true passion.”
After our meeting I thought a lot about what she had
said to me. She
didn’t say “That’s WHAT you do.” She said “That’s
WHO you are.” In other words, WHAT I am doing now in my life
is more about WHO I am rather than WHAT I do.
Then, as if to reinforce the point, a few days later I
came across a quotation in a book from a person who happens to
work as a family therapist. She said, “We must not allow
other people’s limited perceptions to define us.”
At that point I tried to recall the people I had come
across during my daily activities during the previous week.
There were so many. Some were people who I saw several times;
others just in passing. I then realized the extent of my own
“limited perceptions” of those people. All I knew about
them was WHAT they did. Some were serving me in retail stores,
banks, gas stations, or just walking by. Others were doing
what they’ve always done whenever I’ve seen them. I
realized that I did not know much about WHO they were as a
person. All I know is WHAT they did when they were around me
– obviously a “limited perception”.
And then I thought about myself again. I wondered about
the perceptions people had about me. I wondered just how many
of them could say to me the words that my acquaintance had
stated when she said, “That’s who you are”. She knew
enough about me to be confident in making a statement about
WHO I was and not just about WHAT I do. And she was right!
I sat down and thought about how I introduce myself
when I meet people I’ve never met before. It is an
interesting exercise that you should do when you have the
time.
Pretend you are meeting someone for the first time.
Your relationship with that stranger quickly becomes their
“limited perception” of who you are. But it also becomes
how you define yourself in the manner by which you introduce
yourself. For example, depending on the circumstances of our
meeting, I many introduce myself in many different ways. I may
say, “Hi. My name is Robert Kirwan. I am the writer for the
Vision Paper. Or, I am a retired teacher. Or, I am the
marketing manager for the Hanmer Valley Shopping Centre. Or, I
own a tutoring agency. Or, I am a web site publisher. Or, I am
a radio show host.”
Suddenly, while I was going through this exercise, a
strange thing happened to me. I suddenly realized that in each
of those above examples, I wasn’t introducing WHO I was. In
fact, the way I introduce myself to people is entirely
dependent upon the “limited relationship” I think is going
to be established with the person to whom I am speaking. I was
actually creating a “limited perception” in the mind of
the person to whom I was speaking.
In order to give a stranger a better idea of WHO I am,
I would have to say something like, “Hi. I’m Robert Kirwan.
I’m a husband. Or, I’m a father. Or, I’m a
grandfather.” None of those terms would really tell a
stranger much about me. Yet, when all is said and done, I can
write, I can teach, I can organize marketing activities, I can
find tutors for students, I can design web sites and I can
talk on the radio. I can do a lot of different things, but so
what? A lot of other people can do those things as well, but
they are not ME. I do them differently because of WHO I am.
But how can I really know WHO AM I?
Finally, after a lot of deep thinking and reflection, I
suddenly came up with the answer by asking myself another
question. In order to discover my true identity, I asked
myself the question, “WHY DO I DO WHAT I DO?”
I came up with the same answer in virtually every area
of my life. I do what I do because I like helping people. I
actually feel uncomfortable when people do things for me. But
I do like helping others and that explains a lot about WHAT I
DO in the different areas of my life.
I encourage you to go through the same exercise. Take a
look at WHAT you do. Look at all of the different things you
get involved in that could be used to introduce yourself when
meeting a stranger. They ask yourself WHY you do those things.
I guarantee that you will then be able to identify WHO you
are. It will explain a lot about WHAT you do.
Just remember… WHY YOU DO WHAT YOU DO DEFINES WHO
YOU ARE.
Have a good week!
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“There
Is No Such Thing As An Educated Person”
January
29, 2008
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I
came across a profound quote by Eric Hoffer the other day that
really hit home for me. The quote went something like this: "In
times of change, learners inherit the earth, while the people
who consider themselves educated find themselves beautifully
equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists."
Hoffer’s comment reaffirmed one of my own basic
philosophical principals, for I take the position that there
is no such thing on this earth as an “educated person”.
In other words, as long as you are living and
breathing, and as long as you experience life itself, you can
never consider yourself “educated”. Every single moment in
your life is a new learning situation that you have never
before experienced.
Perhaps this might be an oversimplification, but
the following example will give you some idea of what I am
getting at. It doesn’t matter how many times you have gotten
up in the morning, walked over to the toaster and put in the
bread for your morning nourishment. This morning when you
walked over to the toaster was the only time in your life you
will ever experience going through that action, on this
particular day, at that particular time, during the entire
period of your life here on earth. Tomorrow will be different,
precisely because it will be a different day. And even if you
do everything exactly the same as you have done every day in
the past, when you do it tomorrow, you will be learning
something new because you will be experiencing that “moment
of your life” for the very first time. You may not think you
are learning much in the greater scheme of things, but as you
are going through the process of preparing the toast, you will
be reinforcing some skills that form the total essence of your
being. You may simply be learning just how important it is to
take the butter out of the freezer the night before so it is
soft in the morning. You may have learned that before, but
this time you are learning once again how important it is to
have soft butter to spread on your toast, so what you learned
previously will be even stronger than it was before.
If we examine how this principle applies to the
world in general, it becomes much clearer. Take a look around
you. The world is definitely changing and it will never, ever
be the same again. Admittedly the world has gone through
changes at other times in its history, but the enormity of
what is happening to day is without precedent. Unfortunately
there are many people who still insist on continuing to do
what they have always done, and who want to live by the old
rules. These people are experiencing frustration and failure
around almost every corner. They are the ones who think they
can rely upon the knowledge they have accumulated in the past
to deal with the world we are living in today. They are, as
Eric Hoffer says, “Beautifully equipped to deal with a world
that no longer exists”.
In fact, in times of change such as what we are
currently experiencing, the only ones who are going to be able
to cope are those among us who are continually striving to
learn how to adapt to change and who are willing to prepare
themselves for the future. They are the ones who are willing
to do new things and have a thirst for expanding their
knowledge of the world around them. They are “life-long
learners” who wake up each day with renewed excitement about
the prospects for the future and respond to the ever-changing
world in an appropriate manner instead of constantly trying to
fight change and make the new world adapt to them.
And so be it. We are all students of the world.
We are all, no matter what our age may be, going through
“transition periods” in our own evolution. Each stage of
life is preparing us for the next and each stage can be more
wonderful than the one before, if only we accept the principle
that life itself is one huge school system in which we will
never be able to say we have completed our “education”.
There is no such thing as an “educated” person. There are
only those who embrace learning and those who don’t. As long
as we are of this world, if we want to get the most from our
experiences, we must embrace our role as learners, equipping
ourselves for the world we are living in today and preparing
for the world that will be tomorrow.
Have a good week!
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"Culture of Fear Spills
Over Into Our Schools"
Editorial by Robert
Kirwan
January
22, 2008
The
release on
January
10, 2008
of a School Community Safety Advisory Panel report suggests
that there may have been hundreds of incidents of violence
within the Toronto District School Board that have gone
unreported by teachers and students. While the report has
caused quite an uproar in Toronto, all cities across the
province should look at the report as a “wake-up call” to
take a close look at what is going on in their own
jurisdictions.
Most teachers will readily admit that they
are not equipped or trained to deal with some of the serious
behaviours of kids today. One teacher from Toronto was quoted
as saying, "There are kids whose behaviour is so bad that
20 years ago they'd be told to leave school - they don't want
to be there, they're not respectful, they're aggressive and
quite prepared to be violent if they need to be - and yet the
school system is trying to keep them in school and trying not
to disaffect them by punishing them for everything. So
consequently, there's a bit of a mixed message."
The guidelines from the Ministry of
Education are quite clear about the duties of a teacher with
respect to reporting incidents involving students.
Nevertheless, there is so much pressure in schools today to
uphold a positive public image and to focus on student success
that some teachers are hesitant to bring forward reports to
authorities.
This should come as no surprise. The
“culture of fear” that is prevalent in our world today is
merely exhibiting itself in schools since schools are nothing
more than a “mirror of society”. For example, many adults
who consider themselves to be good citizens think nothing
about turning their backs on incidents or activities that
should be reported to police simply because they do not want
to become involved in long, drawn out investigations that will
merely make them “targets for reprisal” once the courts
hand out “meaningless” punishment to the criminals. Not
wanting to place themselves or their family at risk, they
simply pretend not to notice what is going on and let someone
else take care of reporting the incident. And so it is that
many people who witness others carrying weapons in the street,
committing acts of sexual assault and violence, vandalizing or
stealing public and private property, and a whole list of
other misdemeanours feel too intimidated to report what they
have seen. They are just happy that they have not been the
ones who were victimized this time around. This
“culture of fear” has been created by a “society of
bullies” that comes in all forms.
And so it is with teachers who must deal
with many students in their classrooms who come from such a
wide variety of backgrounds. The pressures these students are
facing in their personal life spill over into the classroom
and into hallways, resulting in “flare-ups” that should be
dealt with severely. In many cases witnesses to the incidents
feel it is best to turn and walk away rather than get involved
in something that may in fact have a negative impact upon
themselves. Thus, we have created a “culture of silence”
whereby an unwritten rule has evolved to the point where
students accept the “risks” as part of the normal process
of going from adolescence to adulthood and simply hope to get
out at the end unscathed.
During my own career as a professional educator I
was well aware of the fact that students can easily get back
at teachers and administrators who make life difficult for
them. Students can make a teacher’s life horrible through
forms of retaliation that inflict serious, long-lasting
consequences on anyone who reports them to the authorities.
The penalty for “reporting a crime” is often far more
serious than the penalty for “committing the crime”. That
is not only the case in our schools; it is true for society at
large as well.
You can provide teachers with all of the
information necessary for them to know their duties and
responsibilities. However, when all is said and done, the fear
of making false accusations, of alienating students and
parents; of facing the wrath of parents whose children have
been accused of wrongdoing, and the fear of retaliation
against your home and your family members is going to play a
huge part in whether a person actually reports an incident of
abuse or violence or other inappropriate action he/she has
witnessed. In most cases, it makes far more sense to simply be
happy that no one got seriously hurt, forget about the
situation, finish your job and go home; hoping that tomorrow
will be a better day. Is this wrong? Perhaps. But there are
many who have followed their duty to report and lived to
regret getting involved.
Regardless of all the publicity that has been
generated by the recent report out of
Toronto
,
our schools are still much safer places for our children than
the world they face outside.
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The Theory of Continuity Poses The Question: What’s Next?
Editorial by Robert
Kirwan
January
15, 2008
I want to thank all of my readers who have commented on
my editorial from last week dealing with the “shift from
success to significance” that many of us from the baby
boomer generation as well as our parents from the generation
before us have felt.
Most people
over the age of 40 will experience this “change in
philosophy of life” as they approach retirement age, and in
some careers, with retirement coming in their early 50’s,
this shift will be something that is even stronger. As those
of us in this demographic face our own mortality we continue
to ask the question: “What are we going to do with the time
that’s left?” This is being referred to as the “Theory
of Continuity” where you stop looking at the end of a
particular career as a time to sit back and wait to die, but
rather as a time to look to what you will be doing next. Since
most people living today can expect to be healthy and vibrant
well into their late 70’s and 80’s, there is still a whole
lot of living left during one’s normal retirement years.
And while
the baby boomers are changing the way we look at retirement,
there are tremendous implications for the younger generation
currently in secondary and post-secondary schools and for
those who are just beginning in their own desired careers. For
example, recent surveys show that up to 80% of all baby
boomers interviewed plan on working beyond the age of 65. They
intend to work in the type of jobs that will bring them the
most satisfaction and are willing to work flexible hours for
less pay.
Imagine
what it will be like for business owners who are facing the
prospect of hiring a new graduate from college who has
absolutely no experience, is expecting to receive a high
starting salary, and despite all of the time and money you
invest in training him, is likely to leave you the moment he
finds something better. On the other hand, this same business
owner could outsource the work to one or two baby boomers who
already come with decades of experience, are willing to work
“on demand” whenever the owner needs them, during any time
of the day, for a much lower salary, and since they are at a
stage in life when they have no desire to move away from their
current home, will likely be available for as long as the
business owner needs them. Who do you think is going to get
the job?
When you
speak with people from the baby boom generation you will find
some common paths to happiness. Many of us indicate that that
as we get older we discover that the secret to life comes from
living in the moment, making the people you love a higher
priority, and understanding that happiness comes from the
inside, and not from material possessions. We find that no
matter at what age we are right now, when we look back over
the path we have followed it is what we “gave to the world,
not what we took from the world” that gave us the most
satisfaction. Now that we are more financially secure and do
not have the pressures that we faced while raising families
and meeting our responsibilities to our former careers we can
spend the rest of our days in more meaningful activities doing
what we always wanted to do.
In many
ways, life is just beginning for people in their 50’s and
60’s. It is as if you are entering a second adulthood with
all of the advantages of the life experiences you have gained
during the first 50 years. Many of us have often said that if
we only knew when we were younger what we know now, we may
have done things differently. Well, the reality is that most
baby boomers still have a good 25 to 30 years of good
productivity left inside them. I know many people in their
late 70’s who are still going strong and still making
tremendous contributions to society.
And so,
here I am at the age of 57, “retired” from teaching for
the past six years: the writer for The Vision Paper; the
director of public relations for a shopping centre; publisher
of a community web site; one year into the creation of a
tutoring agency; two weeks into a new venture as a radio host;
“working” seven days a week; and my wife and I still have
time to enjoy our granddaughters, our children and our leisure
activities together. If you had told me that this is where my
life would be when I was 25 years old I never would have
believed you. I can’t wait to see what my life will be like
a year from now, but I do know one thing – whatever it is
that I am doing, it is going to be my choice and it is going
to make me happy.
Have
a good week!
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"Make
2008 The Year We Shift From Success To Significance
”
Editorial by Robert
Kirwan
January
8, 2008
I receive a number of online newsletters through email every
week. One I always take time to read comes from a man named
Michael Josephson who operates a web site called “Character
Counts”. He recently sent out a commentary about something
that was written by Peter Drucker, a management consultant
from the
United
States
. I
think it is worthwhile sharing this with you as we begin the
New Year.
Drucker pointed out that as highly accomplished
people get older, they often feel a need to measure their
lives more in terms of the impact they have rather than by
what they have. Read that last sentence again. He calls
this the shift from “success to significance” and explains
that. “Success is achieving your goals; significance is
having a lasting positive impact on the lives of others.”
Drucker stated that for some, particularly those
people who have accumulated enormous amounts of money and
worldly possessions, “This desire to be significant is just
another form of vanity or yearning to achieve a kind of
immortality through good deeds long remembered. For others,
it’s simply a desire to live a worthy life.”
“Whatever the reason, when people begin to
think more deeply about significance, they tend to place
greater emphasis on enjoying what they already have and
enriching their lives through service to others,” he went
on. “The irony is that living a life focused on the pursuit
of significance is much more personally gratifying than one
devoted to climbing the ladder of success. As author Stephen
Covey warns, it’s no good climbing to the top of a ladder
that’s leaning against the wrong wall.”
During the Christmas holidays I had a chance to
read some articles in local newspapers about the economic
future of the
Sudbury
area. There were some startling figures in these articles,
especially with respect to the fact that some 20% of the
population lives at or below the poverty line; that over
10,000 people visit the area food banks each month; that up to
60% of all jobs in the Sudbury area pay less than $10 per
hour; that the vacancy rate is so low it is beginning to have
a direct impact on our ability to attract newcomers to the
city; that there is a waiting list of 1200 for affordable
rent-geared-to-income housing; that up to 30% of our hospital
beds are occupied by people who are chronically ill and
waiting for space in long-term care nursing homes.
Now I know that there are an awful lot of people
living in the City of
Greater
Sudbury
who
have achieved a huge amount of success during their lifetime.
Many of these people are now reaching the age when they will
feel the call to shift from “success to significance”. The
opportunities for these people to do positive things for the
community will be tremendous during the next decade.
I see many examples of this shift from “success
to significance” occurring every day. I see people who have
worked in a career their entire life and who are now
volunteering for a number of service organizations and giving
of their time and money to help others. I see successful
business people going out of their way to help the less
fortunate, demonstrating that it is important to give back to
the community. I see struggling families who still have time
to help out others who are struggling even more than they are.
I see young and old alike volunteering to organize
recreational activities that are affordable and yet still
allow people to spend time with their family, friends and
neighbours.
I don’t make New Years resolutions. But if I
did, I would resolve to make 2008 the year I begin my shift
from “success to significance”. While my own measure of
success has not resulted in huge financial accumulations, it
has certainly provided me with a network of contacts and
acquaintances which will make it easier for me to launch
initiatives that may have a significant impact on the quality
of life of others around me, especially children and students
of the area. This will be the year I make my own move towards
“significance”. How about you?
Have a good week!
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