Have
you ever had too much time on your hands and drifted into that “I wonder
what would have happened if..” dream land? You know the place I mean.
Where you get to thinking, I wonder what would have happened if I took
that job in Toronto? I wonder what would have happened if I had enough
money to buy that new house on the lake? I wonder what would have happened
if I had waited until I was older to get married?
If
you live and breathe and have an ounce of honesty in your body, you will
admit that you too have drifted into the
“I wonder what would have happened...” state from time to time.
During the Christmas holidays I had the opportunity
to watch one of my favourite classics of all time, ‘It’s A Wonderful
Life’, starring Jimmy Stewart. I also saw three other movies: Family Man
(Nicolas Cage), Frequency (David Quaid), and Destiny (James Belushi). Each
of these movies centres around the main character being taken back in time
where he is given an opportunity to make a ‘different choice’ which
results in his entire life being altered. He then goes through the
nightmare of living for a while in the new life until he realizes that his
real life wasn’t as bad as he thought.
I
don’t know exactly why movies like this appeal so much to me, but I do
know that I feel immensely satisfied and uplifted each time I watch one.
Perhaps it is because it makes me realize that, in spite of all the
troubles I think I have in my life, there is so, so
much to be thankful for that I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
And yet, it is quite frightening to think back to some of those
life-changing choices that I have made in the past and realize that if I
had made a different choice, nothing in my life would be the same and all
of the people I hold dear to my heart would vanish.
When
I was in Teachers’ College in 1973, I had a chance to take a job in
Toronto, but I made one final attempt at convincing the Sudbury Board to
give me a contract. Why did I write that one final letter? What made me
sit down and draft a letter that I thought would just be thrown in the
garbage? Where would I be today if I had started my career in Toronto?
Back
on a Sunday afternoon in January 1974, my wife dragged me away from the
Super Bowl game to look at a house in Val Therese. I grew up in Lively and
had never set foot in Val Caron or Hanmer, let alone given any thought to
living there. Twenty-seven years later, here we are, still in the same
house that I missed a Super Bowl game for - the house where we raised a
family and where we fully intend to continue to build memories until the
end of our time on earth. What if I would have watched the game instead of
gone to look at the house? What if we would have bought a house in Lively
or Sudbury instead of Valley East?
Whenever
I think about such things it sends a shiver up and down my body. I look
back on all of the wonderful memories and the fabulous people I have met
over the years, and it leaves me with a hollow feeling when I consider
that my life may very well have missed those memories and people. I think
of all the people I have touched along the way and I realize that their
lives may also have been changed in some significant way if I had not
entered into their life. It is a bit frightening to know that my life and the lives of
so many others may have been so different if I hadn’t taken 30 minutes
out of my day to write a letter to the School Board in 1973; or if I had
felt too comfortable sitting in front of the television drinking beer and
watching the super bowl game to
drive all the way to Val Therese to look at a house?
Then
my mind begins to wander to other times in my life when choices were made
without much thought. What would my life have been like if I had not
hitch-hiked to Creighton that cold winter night in 1968 to watch the
hockey game at the Creighton club. The night when one of my friends
introduced me to a girl by the name of Valerie Starcevic who, four short
years later would walk down the aisle with me to take my name as hers, and
eventually drag me away from a Super Bowl game to look at a house in Val
Therese? What if that car hadn’t stopped that cold winter night to pick
me up at precisely the moment when I was about to give up on any chance of
getting a ride to Creighton? What if the car had gone on by and I had
turned back to go home to watch the hockey game?
Life
is a series of choices. Every choice you make may well change the
direction your life will take. And yet, when we make those choices, we
seldom take into consideration the long-term impact that they may have.
Why we make the choices we do may not always be clear at the time. They
may never be clear, and I am sure you must also shake your head at some of
your choices and wonder how in the name of God you made some of the
decisions you did make.
One
thing I am becoming more sure of as I get older, is that life generally
unfolds for one reason.. “it was meant to be!”
I
have learned that there is no use trying to rationalize or make sense out
of what life brings you. It is best to make all of your decisions based on
the conditions of the day and on what you feel in your heart is right, and
then go forward with the inner confidence that you will always be able to
handle the challenges that come forth. Always be certain that every
decision, as long as you feel it is the right one for you, will bring you
happiness that would not have occurred if you had decided differently. And
above all, remember that you can never go back and undecide! You can only
go forward.
So
as we enter a new millennium in the history of the world, let us go forth
to enjoy everything that life offers us with the knowledge that “it was
meant to be”! And if you need to be convinced that your life is
wonderful, just take the time to watch one of the movies.
Have
a good week!
