I once met a farmer who had lived on the same farm all
his life. It was a good farm with fertile soil, but with the passing of
the years, the farmer began to think that maybe there was something better
for him. Every day he found a new reason for criticizing some feature of
his old farm. Finally, he decided to sell. He listed the farm with a real
estate broker who promptly prepared an advertisement emphasizing all the
many advantages of the acreage: ideal location, modern equipment, healthy
stock, acres of fertile ground, high yields on crops, well-kept barns and
pens, nice two-story house on a hill above the pasture.
When the real estate agent called to read the ad to the farmer for
his approval prior to placing it in the local paper, the farmer listened
carefully. When the real estate agent had finished, the farmer cried out, AHold
everything. I=ve
changed my mind. I=m
not going to sell. Why, I=ve
been looking for a place just like that all my life!”
I think you will agree that each of us, from time to time, complain
about things such as our home, our car, our property or our job. As human
beings, it is natural to want the best things in life.
Nevertheless, the next time you find yourself seriously questioning
one of your possessions, sit down and write up a very convincing imaginary
newspaper ad that could be placed in the For Sale section. See what
happens when you describe the positive things about this possession of
which you are so critical. See what happens when you try to find someone
else to take your job. You certainly won’t be including any negative
points in the imaginary newspaper ad. In order to sell something, you have
to describe only the very best qualities. When you read the imaginary ad
back to yourself, see what you think about the possession now. You, too,
may be like the farmer who suddenly discovered that his farm was exactly
what he was looking for, but he was too focused on the things that were
wrong to notice all of the good points.
Take this exercise to a higher level the next time you find
yourself questioning the relationship you have with your spouse, a parent,
a child, or a friend. Human relationships have their ups and downs, so it
is natural to wonder at times if you might be better off with someone
else. If you ever find yourself in this frame of mind, sit down in a quiet
place and write an “obituary” for that person. Experience the powerful
emotions that will surely overcome you when you imagine having to sum up a
loved one’s life in a few paragraphs that could fit in a newspaper
obituary. Notice how easy it is to come up with nice things to say about
the person. Notice how much
“goodness” there “was” in this person. When it sinks in that some
day you may actually have to go through this exercise “for real”, wipe
the tears from your eyes and then go and spend quality time with that
person. Enjoy the moment and realize just how lucky you are to have such a
wonderful person to love.
It’s great to be back! Have a good week!